Taken in the Night
by sheviking
Summary: Re-post of my first story, Taken. Bella is kidnapped by Edward, the man who has secretly wanted her and watched her from afar. Is it love or merely obsession which motivates him? Bella is about to find out. ON TEMP. HIATUS.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer

**Hey everyone, surprised? I bet at least some of you thought this would never happen. But it is happening; Taken is being re-posted! :) I know I said that I wanted to wait until I had ten completed chapters but after the overwhelming support and encouragement I received yesterday in the Facebook group Sheviking's Stories, I felt compelled to start posting early. Thank you, lovely ladies. :)**

**To those of you who have read the story from its very beginning, you will probably notice quite a few changes along the way; some chapters have been deleted completely, some scenes have been changed and new ones have been added. I hope you still like it.**

**To new readers: Welcome, I hope you enjoy it. **

**All of this would not have been possible without the help and encouragement of my beta, Melanie, who wants a Takenward of her very own. Thank you, my friend, for not letting me forget about this story and for doing such a wonderful job on all my fics.**

**An extra disclaimer because this time around I want to avoid BS and flames: I know that the premise of this story is incredulous, and I in no way encourage you to go out and kidnap someone to make them fall in love with you. This is just a story and in real life we would all of course root for Bella to kick Edward's ass and then escape. Again, it's just a story. A fantasy, if you will, and please keep that in mind when you read it. That is all. Enjoy! **

BPOV

I woke up and immediately knew something was wrong. The ceiling above me was not the same as I normally looked at when I opened my eyes in the morning.

_Where am I? _

My heart started beating faster and my hands went clammy as the fear set in.

_Something is terribly wrong!_

I sat up and noticed that that I was in a large bed with dark blue sheets that were incredibly soft and clearly not the cheap ones that I used to sleep in at home. My eyes quickly darted around the room which was large and very nicely decorated. On the wall across from the bed was a huge flat-screen TV, there were bookcases filled with books and DVDs. On the nightstand there was a vase with beautiful white roses which I could smell from where I was sitting.

_What did I do last night?_

I thought back. I had gone to bed at 11 after a boring night at home and nothing out of the ordinary had happened. I looked down at myself and my heart went into overdrive when I saw that I was wearing a nightgown made out of silk rather than my usual cotton pajamas. Someone had changed my clothes!

Panic started to set in and I felt the tears begin to form while I grabbed the sheet to cover my scarcely clad body. Just then I heard someone clear their throat in the corner of the room. The hairs on the back of my head stood up and I felt a rush of fear as the realization hit me:

_I am not alone._

**Not the most pleasant way to wake up.**

**Don't worry; chapters will be longer as the story progresses. **


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

BPOV

I whipped my head around towards the person who had just made their presence known, but in the dimly lit room I could not make him out completely.

He was sitting on a chair in the corner, perfectly still, watching me.

In one swift move he was on his feet and approached the bed. I gasped and scurried backwards until I was pressed against the headboard of the bed desperately trying to get as much distance between us as possible.

He stopped abruptly and held his hands out in front of him, in what I suppose was a calming manner. I watched in terror as he slowly walked closer and finally sat down on the bed. I know I should have jumped up and made a run for the door but I was completely petrified and it felt like my body was frozen solid.

I felt the tears coming again and began to tremble. What was he going to do to me?

He sat perfectly still as if he was waiting for me to do something. I was too afraid to look at him but the waiting was excruciating so I finally glanced up at him.

I could see him now. His body was long and lean and his skin pale. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a grey long-sleeved shirt. From what I could see of his face in profile he had a strong jaw, high cheekbones, full lips and a slight stubble on his chin. His hair was in disarray and a dark color. What surprised me the most was the fact that he was young. He didn't look that much older than my twenty years. I don't know why I had expected him to be old. I guess I didn't understand why this seemingly attractive young man would have taken me.

_Nice stereotyping there, Bella. Like only old ugly men can be perverts!_

He must have sensed that I was looking at him and started turning his face towards me. I immediately looked down, too afraid that even the slightest change in the room would make him jump me. Out of the corner of my eye I could see him extend his hand towards me and that's when I suddenly felt my body come to life.

I bolted out of the bed and ran across the room only to remember that the door was located on the other side of the bed where he was sitting. I watched helplessly as he stood up and walked towards me slowly. I backed away until I felt the wall behind me and I knew I was trapped.

_Oh God! Oh no!_

I started sobbing uncontrollably as my legs gave out and I slid to the floor.

"Shhh," I heard him say, trying to soothe me as one would a crying baby.

He knelt down in front of me and I whimpered in fear of his proximity to me.

"Are you going to kill me?" I choked out between sobs. "Oh God, please! I don't want to die!"

"No, Bella, I am not going to hurt you. Ever. " he whispered. "Look at me, please."

_He knows my name!_

I ducked my head at first but then slowly peered up at him and then I saw his eyes. They were a deep shade of green and filled with sadness. It stunned me for a moment that he looked so heartbroken because I couldn't understand why he would look at me that way. Now I finally got a good look at his face I was shocked by what I saw. He was undoubtedly the most handsome man I had ever laid eyes on and I caught myself staring at him with my mouth hanging open.

_How can I think he's handsome? _

"I would never harm you, love." He said with a voice that was filled with emotion. "I promise," he added.

_Love?_

I stared at him, incredulously. Was he kidding me?

All of a sudden he held out his hand to me but I recoiled, afraid of what he would do.

"I just wanted to help you up," he quickly said and once again he looked so sad that I almost believed him.

"I don't want you to fear me, Bella. I'll be good to you, I swear." He said as he held his hand out again.

_He'll be good to me? What is he talking about? He expects me to stay here? What is wrong with this guy?_

There was no way in hell that I was going to touch him and I raised myself up, ignoring his hand. I stood in front of him unsure of what to do. My face was still wet from tears and I was getting a little cold in my short nightgown. Then it hit me. He had changed my clothes during the night. I had been naked and completely at his mercy! What had he done to me?

Anger flared in me suddenly. I was strong and independent, and I wasn't about to let this psycho know just how scared I was. I took a step back against the wall, looked him straight in the eye and hissed:

"Where are my clothes and what the fuck gives you the right to take them off me?"

He gaped at me, obviously taken aback by my sudden change of mood and then he looked down as if he was embarrassed.

"They got wet. I didn't want you to get sick," he mumbled.

"Right, you put me in this sexy little outfit because you didn't want me to get sick! You expect me to believe that? What did you do to me?" I shouted angrily. "I want to go home right now!"

I started to cross the room but I only made it a few feet when I felt his hands on my upper arms holding me back.

"Please," he implored quietly. "Please don't leave me."

**Would you stay or would you leave? ;)**

**I just wanted to take a moment to assure all of you that my other stories won't be neglected because I have started re-posting this. I have started writing the final chapter of The Education of Professor Cullen and I have plans to continue The Blizzard once that's done. And of course, I won't forget about My Viking, either. Lots of good stuff coming up there. :)**

**Thank you for reading. :)**


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

**One more chapter today. Just don't expect me to keep up this posting schedule, mkay? ;)**

**Enjoy! **

BPOV

I struggled against his grip on me and tried to move forward but he spun me around easily and held me tight against his chest. I fought him with everything I had but it didn't seem to affect him one bit. I realized that he was much, much stronger than me and there was no way I would be able to wrestle myself out of his embrace. The truth of the situation turned my anger into sadness. I wasn't strong at all. I was weak and terrified. I began sobbing again and my vision was blurred by tears.

"Oh, no! Please don't cry," he whispered when he felt my body tremble. "I won't hurt you. You are safe with me, I swear, Bella. I swear."

"Please just let me go! Please, I'm begging you!" I said shakily and looked up at him with pleading eyes. "I won't tell anyone. Just let me go!"

"I can't do that, Bella. Ask me anything. Anything but that," he answered softly.

His left arm was still holding me against him and he raised his right hand to my face and wiped away the tears that were streaming down my cheeks.

"You are so lovely," he murmured and brushed a few strands of hair out of my face. He looked deeply into my eyes and then averted his gaze to my lips.

Before I could respond he suddenly released me from his hold, stepped back and took a deep breath as if he was trying to calm himself. Then nothing happened for a while. We just stood there, breathing. I had never been so scared before in my life. What was he waiting for? I took stock of my body. I was cold and thirsty but I could ignore that for the moment. What I couldn't ignore was also what worried me the most; the pressure in my lower abdomen which made me squirm and want to cross my legs.

"What's wrong?" he whispered.

_Everything! This is all so wrong!_

"I…I have to pee," I whimpered, pathetically.

"Oh, of course."

He stepped aside and pointed to a door located on the other side of the room.

"The bathroom is in there."

I didn't move a muscle.

"It's okay," he said. "I've put some clothes in there for you if you want to change. You can also take a shower if you want."

My mind was reeling. There was no way…

He took a step towards me.

"Bella-"

"Please don't follow me in there!" I pleaded.

"Why would I…"

His eyes widened.

"No!" he exclaimed. "I…I wouldn't. I wouldn't ever…you can go in there alone. That's just for you. I have one in my room and one downstairs that I use."

I tried to gather the information that he had revealed. This wasn't his room, thankfully, and there was downstairs in this place.

_A basement? Oh,God. Please, not a basement! Don't let him put me down there! _

"You're shaking," he whispered. "Please, put some clothes on."

I inched my way past him and turned to back towards the bathroom door, not taking my eyes off him for even a second. If he was going to attack me I would want to know it was coming. He didn't. He just watched me with sad eyes until I shut the door and was finally alone. I noticed immediately that there was no window and I choked back a sob. No escape here. I glanced briefly at the shower but decided against it even though I felt cold. I was too afraid of him busting in on me while I was naked so I quickly turned to the toilet instead and peed in what must have been record time. Then I noticed the clothes.

I was relieved that they were similar to something I would have picked out myself: A pair of nice jeans, a simple black t-shirt and a red hoodie. There was also a pair of black sneakers and a matching set of bra and panties, which were much sexier than anything I normally would pick out. I shuddered violently at the thought of this man buying underwear while thinking of me wearing them.

I hesitated for a few seconds before I quickly took off the nightgown and shivered again when my worst fears were realized. I hadn't noticed before but I was wearing a pair of black lace panties that did not belong to me. He had even changed my underwear at some point during the night. I didn't think that he had done anything to me but I couldn't be certain.

_Please don't let him hurt me! _

I put on the clothes he had picked out for me and washed my face. I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the mirror. I looked horrible. I was pale, my skin was blotchy and my eyes were red from crying. My hair was a complete mess and when I began combing it out I felt that it was a bit damp as if it had been wet during the night. Maybe he wasn't lying about my clothes being wet? It didn't matter. Everything he had done was wrong.

There was a light knock on the door but it still made me jump.

"Bella, are you alright in there?"

_Please don't come in!_

There was no lock and he could enter the bathroom anytime he wanted. I was trapped. Even more so than before. I backed away from the door and huddled in the corner underneath the sink, trying to make myself as small as possible. I just wanted to disappear.

"Bella? Please, you're starting to worry me."

_I'm not here, I'm not here, I'm not here…_

I hid my face and wrapped my arms around my head when I heard him knocking again, more insistently this time.

"I'm opening the door now, okay?"

_No! Stay away from me!_

I heard the handle being turned and then a sharp intake of breath in the quiet room.

"Bella? Are you hurt? Please talk to me," I heard him say as he approached.

Suddenly, I felt his hands on my shoulders, gently but firmly pulling me out from the corner.

"No, please don't!" I screamed.

I thrashed against him but it was futile and I ended up in his lap where he held me firmly as I cried and cried.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he whispered over and over into my hair. "Please, don't be scared of me."

After a while my sobs quieted and my body grew heavy in his arms. We were still positioned awkwardly on the floor but he didn't seem to mind. His chin rested on top of my head and his hands gently stroked my hair while he hummed a little tune. If I wasn't so scared I might have enjoyed the warmth of his body wrapped around mine because I felt so cold.

"I'd like to get up now," I whispered.

His hands stilled and slid off my back when I scrambled to my feet, doing my best not to step on him.

"Thank you," he said softly, looking down at his hands. "For letting me hold you."

I didn't say anything and moved backwards when he slowly lifted himself off the ground and stood in front of me; tall and terrifying.

"Let me make you some breakfast," he offered out of nowhere. "You'll feel better once you've eaten something."

"I'm not hungry," I whispered.

My stomach growled loudly the second the lie left my lips and my heart was in my throat. Would he be angry now?

"Yes, you are," he chuckled softly. "Come and rest while I cook for you."

I followed him out of the bathroom and he went to the door, unlocking it with a key he took from the right front pocket of his jeans.

"What would you like to eat?" he asked.

I shrugged. I didn't know what he wanted me to say.

"I'll just surprise you then?" he asked, smiling now.

I looked away from him, feeling numb. I'd had quite enough surprises for one day.

"I'll…I'll be back really soon," he said softly and while I was sure he thought it was a promise, to me it sounded like a threat.

The sound of the door closing and the click of the lock made me relax the tiniest bit, knowing that there was some distance between us. I waited for a few moments before rushing to the window where I pulled the curtains apart, blinding my vision momentarily as the room filled with grey light. The first thing I saw was the bars, preventing my escape. There was truly no way out of here. I looked out of the window, noting that the room was located on the second floor, but that was all I really got out of the view. There was nothing to see otherwise; just the yard which looked neglected, and grass and trees beyond that. Maybe his neighbors would be visible from the other side of the house because there wasn't any on this side. Also, no car. That was probably parked around the front of the house. I mean, he had to have one. Otherwise how did I get here?

_Maybe he's not alone in this. Maybe…maybe there are other guys who are in on this. Maybe I'll get a new jailor each day or each week. Because they'll all want to…to…_

I curled my upper body forward and vomited on the floor before crawling into the corner where I sat, shaking and heaving for breath, until I heard the key in the lock.

"Oh, fuck!" the man yelled followed by a loud crashing sound which made me scream in terror.

He was next to me within moments and I recoiled when I felt his hand on my forehead.

"What happened? Are you sick?" he asked. "You don't feel warm. Do you want some painkillers or something for your tummy?"

I started laughing hysterically. For some reason hearing my kidnapper and soon-to-be rapist, using a child's word like 'tummy' was the funniest thing ever.

"I'm losing my mind!" I gasped between laughs that soon turned into sobs. "None of this is real, this can't be happening to me!"

"Please, don't cry," he implored and wiped my face with his sleeve. "I can't stand to see you in tears."

"Why? Can't get it up if the girl cries?" I snarled, forgetting my fear.

He blanched and moved back, the look on his face shocked.

"Oh, God. I'm sorry," I whimpered. "I didn't mean to…please, don't hurt me, don't rape me!"

"I won't," he said immediately. "I won't ever hurt you, I promise."

"W-what about the others?" I hiccupped.

"Others?" he asked, frowning.

"You're alone?" I whispered.

He let out a bitter sounding laugh.

"Yeah, I'm alone."

My initial reaction was relief knowing that I wouldn't be passed around but, really, did it make any difference? I didn't believe a word this guy said about not hurting me. He was still kneeling in front of me but his mind seemed like it was a million miles from here. He turned his face away for a moment and quickly wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. I ignored the urge to ask if he was alright. I couldn't care about that.

"I ruined breakfast," I said, dully, when I noticed the tray, plates and cups on the floor next to the door where he dropped them to get to me.

"No, it was my fault," he said and unfolded his body to stand. "I can make more."

"Okay," I whispered and hobbled to my feet.

"Maybe you should lie down?" he suggested and motioned to the bed.

"Maybe."

He sighed and started cleaning up the mess on the floor while I watched silently. My heart started to race when he walked out and simply left the door open. I heard his retreating footsteps and then nothing. Before I could even contemplate approaching the door, the footsteps were back, though, and he entered holding a wet floor rag which he used to mop up my vomit and the food that was spilled.

"There. Good as new," he said, giving me a small smile.

It made my eyes water again and my vision of him blurred.

"Oh, love," he said quietly and I was grateful that he kept his distance. "I'll make some more breakfast and then we can talk, alright?"

I nodded, feeling numb, and only after I heard the click of the lock telling me that he had left the room did I dare lay down on the bed to sob uncontrollably.

**So, how does everyone feel about Edward now? By the way, I promise that Bella won't be bawling every chapter like she did in this one. She's just terrified and I can't really blame her at this point. **


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

**Thank you all so much for all your lovely reviews. I am blown away by the response. I honestly didn't think that many of you still remembered this story.**

**A few of my stories are up for awards in the Tomato Soup Awards (you can Google it) but I really want you guys to vote for Melanie (Edward's Eternal) who is nominated for Best Beta. She deserves it so much! Thank you in advance. :)**

**Enjoy!**

BPOV

I don't know how much time passed but after a while I heard the lock turn and lifted my head to see the man enter, balancing another tray in one hand. He put it on the small table near the window and pulled out a chair.

"It's ready," he said quietly.

I wiped my face with my sleeve, not caring that tears and snot stained it, and approached cautiously. Sensing my wariness, he moved out of the way as I sat down and looked over the food. Eggs, bacon, toast and fruit. It looked good and my empty stomach rumbled when the smell hit my nose.

"Here," he said, and handed me a glass of what appeared to be orange juice. "You must be thirsty."

I was, and raised the glass to my lips without thinking.

_Don't drink it!_

I set it down quickly and averted my eyes.

"What's wrong?" he asked. "I can get you something else. Milk? Water?"

I shook my head.

"Why won't you drink it?"

"Please don't…don't make me fall asleep again," I whispered and raised my eyes to look at him.

He seemed puzzled for a moment but I saw when realization dawned on him.

"No!" he blurted out. "It's just juice. I won't drug you or anything."

I didn't believe him. He had done that already, or I would have woken up when he kidnapped me. I was a light sleeper and I knew that he had to have drugged me in order to abduct me.

"See?" he said and poured himself a glass from the pitcher which he swallowed down in one large drink.

I lifted my glass again and took a small sip, tasting it carefully. It just tasted like orange juice. Ice-cold, delicious, freshly squeezed orange juice that I hardly ever bought because it cost three times as much as the regular kind in a carton.

"Have some food," he said and pulled out the other chair across the table. "Can I…can I join you?"  
>I shrugged. I couldn't stop him anyway so I didn't see what he even bothered to ask first. He sat down and waited until I had taken a little food before putting some on his own plate but he didn't eat and it was unnerving having him watch me while I did. I jumped a little in my seat when he suddenly reached for the thermos and poured me a cup of coffee.<p>

"Black with two lumps of sugar, right?" he asked.

My stomach lurched. How did he know that? Had he been watching me?

"H-how l-long?" I stuttered. "You've b-been watching m-me."

"Months," he replied somberly. "I kept my distance at first, I swear. I didn't want to intrude on your life. I just wanted…to…to be a part of it."

"Oh, God," I moaned as orange juice mixed with bile rose in my already sore throat. "I feel sick."

I lurched forward until my head and arms rested on the edge of the table. I flinched when I felt his hand, rubbing circles on my back.

"Easy, love," he whispered. "Deep breaths, deep breaths."

Unwillingly, my body obeyed the command and my nausea slowly vanished.

"My name is Edward," he said.

My head shot up. He had just told me his name. He didn't want to be anonymous and it terrified me.

"Why are telling me that?"

"I, um, I thought you'd like to know my name," he said.

"I don't." I shook my head. "I don't want to know anything about you."

"Oh."

He sounded so sad and defeated. Was that just a step away from anger?

_Way to upset your kidnapper, you idiot! Fix it!_

"I'm sorry," I whispered. "I-I didn't mean it. I'm sorry…Edward."

"Yes, you did," he said. "I know that you hate me for what I've done."

"I-"

I couldn't bring myself to lie and say that I didn't hate him for having done this to me. I just couldn't. But I had to try and turn this conversation around somehow. Make him see me as a person. Humanize myself as much as possible to keep him from harming me.

"I'm Isabella," I said, even though he already knew that. "My friends call me Bella."

"Can I call you Bella?" he asked, hope evident in his voice.

"Sure." I gave him my best fake smile.

He regarded me for a moment before giving me a small smile in return. I hated that I noticed how handsome it made him look. I wished he was hideous, but he wasn't.

"I go to college, I love reading and music, and I have a father who needs me very much," I continued, even if it the part about Charlie was a blatant lie.

"I need you, too," he whispered.

_But what for, exactly? Maybe money?_

I knew that was a long shot, at best. The room was outfitted with expensive-looking things and we were apparently in a house, in which this guy, Edward, lived. Still, a kidnapping for ransom scenario was the least traumatic to think about.

"My dad, he isn't rich," I said. "But he will give you everything he owns to get me back."

At least that part was true. I may not talk to Charlie very often, or pretty much at all anymore, but I still knew that I could count on him if I was ever in trouble. And, boy was I in trouble now.

"Bella, I don't want your father's money," Edward said. "I just…I just want…you."

"Oh, God," I whispered. "You're not ever letting me go, are you?"

I rose from the table, knocking over the chair as I went and stumbled into the bathroom. I didn't have anywhere else to go. My hands gripped the edge of the sink as I tried to control my breathing which was coming out in short pants.

"This isn't happening, this isn't happening," I chanted over and over.

"Bella?"

My body tensed at the sound of his hesitant approach. I couldn't breathe. The whole room was spinning. What had he done to me?

"You poisoned the food," I gasped. "I'm going to die."

"No, love. You're okay," he said behind me, his panicked voice betraying his calm words. "You're having an anxiety attack. Just breathe deeply, it'll pass, I promise. I wouldn't ever harm you."

"You. Already. Have," I wheezed.

My vision darkened and I stumbled for a moment before I felt my body being lifted off the ground.

"No, no, don't hurt me," I begged weakly as the man, Edward, carried me out of the bathroom.

"I'm just putting you on the bed, love," he practically cooed. "Everything is alright. You're fine, you're fine."

"No, I'm not," I cried. "I want to go home. Please! I want my dad! Daddy! Daddy!"

I hadn't wanted my dad for anything since the age of ten when mom died and I became the caretaker of the family. Charlie wasn't a bad father, just clueless. He had worked, my mom had taken care of everything else, and when she died the natural order of things was disrupted at the Swan house. I took over where she had left off; doing all the household chores while Charlie worked at all hours. I learned to take care of myself.

Now I wanted my dad to save me, to protect me, but he wasn't here. There was only the stranger named Edward who cradled me gently as he sat down the bed with me in his lap.

"Shhh, it's alright," he whispered and rocked me slowly back and forth. "I'm so sorry, Bella. I'm so sorry. I'll take care of you. You'll never want for anything ever again."

"Please, just let me go home," I begged as I gave up the struggle to keep my weary head upright and instead rested it on his shoulder.

"Bella," he whispered into my hair and held me a little tighter. "You _are _home."

_No, I am not!_

"I've wanted this for so long," he said softly, after a while. "You in my arms, I mean."

I shivered and he rubbed my back.

"Cold, love?" he asked.

I shook my head.

"Are you sure? I can make you some hot chocolate if you want? With marshmallows. As many as you want."

"I'm not a child," I whispered.

"I know," he said, sounding hurt. "I just wanted to do something nice for you. This can't be easy for you but I think you're handling all of this really well."

"Have you…" I hesitated, not sure if I wanted an answer to my question.

"Have I what? You can ask me anything you want, Bella. I won't get mad."

"Have you done this before? Um, kidnapping, that is."

He sighed.

"No, I haven't. It's not like I planned this, I swear. Yes, I watched you and stuff but I didn't do it because I wanted to bring here like this."

I wondered what 'stuff' he had done besides watch me but decided not to ask. I didn't know how much more I could take. I had calmed somewhat, and I didn't know if it was just because I was so tired or because Edward kept rocking me softly back and forth. It was a big step up from panicking, though, that was for sure. At least now I had a chance of actually thinking coherently. But I couldn't do that in Edward's presence and wiggled out of his embrace.

"I'd like to be alone now," I said and backed away from him.

He looked crestfallen.

"No, you don't want that, Bella," he whispered, but still stood and walked to the table.

"Do you want me to leave this?" he asked and motioned to the breakfast. "You didn't eat a lot."

I shook my head.

"You have to eat," he insisted.

"No, I don't," I said, raising my chin in defiance.

Where my courage came from I had no idea.

"Please?" he whispered and took a step toward me.

_Don't come near me!_

"Okay," I nodded and moved as far away from him as possible. "I'll eat it, I promise."

"Thank you," he said. "I'll go and then come back a little later?"  
><em>You can go to Hell, asshole!<em>

Of course, I was too scared to tell him that and simply nodded again. He lingered at the door and it was obvious that he didn't want to leave.

"Um, you can read a book or watch TV if you want," he said. "Just, you know, make yourself at home."

_This is not my home._

I strangled a sob but he noticed the tears in my eyes just the same.

"Oh, Bella," he said softly and took a hesitant step towards me.

"Don't!" I croaked and moved into the corner. "Just leave me alone."

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

His eyes pleaded with me and I almost believed that he was sincere in his apology. I looked away from him and waited for him to go.

"I won't leave the house, I promise," he said. "Just call out if you need something, alright?"

I nodded.

"And if you want some company," he said, softly. "I'm…here."

"I don't," I said.

He made a sound that sounded like something between a sigh and a sob, but left without another word.

**Aw, poor kidnapper. :( Is anyone else feeling sorry for him or do you still want the cops to come charging in and throw his ass in jail? Let me know. :)**


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

**Another one? Yup. :)**

**But now I am out of pre-written chapters so please don't expect me to post this often. I do have a life with a husband and two kids plus university where I start working on my Master's thesis this semester. Oh, and three other WIPs. It's a wonder I get any sleep!**

**Thank you so much for your wonderful reviews. As expected, they are very diverse; some think Edward belongs in jail, some feel sorry for him and suggest therapy and one just wants Bella to give in already and get to the sexin'. Yeah, that's not gonna happen in this chapter, that's for sure. ;)**

**As always, this would not have been possible without Melanie so be sure to leave her some love in your reviews! **

**Enjoy!**

BPOV

Hours passed before I was able to get up off the floor where I had practically collapsed after Edward left the room. At that point, breakfast had gotten cold and I ended up flushing the leftovers on my plate down the toilet because I was afraid of his reaction if he thought I hadn't finished it. I was thankful that he stayed out and gave me space but that didn't relax me much. Every half hour or so I would hear soft footsteps outside the room and then see the shadows of his feet underneath the door when he simply stood there, waiting for God knows what. I wasn't about to call for him, that was for damn sure!

I still didn't know what he wanted from me. It wasn't money and if his intention was to kill or assault me, wouldn't he have done it by now? The uncertainty gnawed at my nerves and each time I heard his approaching footsteps my heart would start to pound furiously. In his absence, I looked more closely at the two windows but found that the bars in front of them were beyond sturdy. The best I could do was maybe to break the glass in one of them and call for help but I was too afraid to do that while Edward was still in the house and I still wasn't sure if he even had neighbors who would be able to hear me.

No, the only real way of escape was through the door and that was locked. It seemed utterly hopeless.

Edward returned by nightfall and found me sitting in the same corner where he left me. He turned on the lights and I squinted against it since my eyes had gotten used to the darkness.

"Why are you sitting in the dark?" he asked, as he entered the room.

I shrugged.

"It seemed appropriate for a prison cell."

He swallowed thickly and gave me a look filled with sadness.

"You didn't read or watch TV?" he asked.

I shook my head.

"Bella…it doesn't have to be like this," he said, quietly. "You can do whatever you want here. Anything at all."  
>"Except leave," I whispered.<p>

He nodded slowly and cleared his throat.

"Yes, except leave me."

I rested my forehead on top of my knees and wrapped my arms around my legs so I wouldn't have to look at him anymore.

"I'm going to bring us some dinner, okay?"

"Whatever," I muttered petulantly, even though my stomach growled at the mention of food.

"I'll be back really soon," he said. "I'm almost done cooking."

_I couldn't care less!_

He walked out, and when I looked up to make sure he was gone I saw that he had left the door slightly ajar. Immediately, my heart started racing. Had he done this on purpose or was it a blunder? I stood up and slowly walked to the door, all the while listening for Edward. A part of me was afraid that this was some sort of trick and he hadn't gone downstairs but was waiting right outside the door, ready to hurt me for stepping outside my prison cell. I peeked out into the hallway but there wasn't anyone there, just three other doors that looked just like the one to 'my' room.

_Oh, God. Does he have other girls here?_

Edward had said that he hadn't kidnapped anyone before but how trustworthy could a guy really be when he did something like this to begin with? I did hope that he wasn't lying because the thought that more girls like me were stuck in this nightmare was just horrible. I listened carefully for sounds of movement but the only noises I picked up were faint ones coming from downstairs; plates being moved and clattering of utensils.

"Hello?" I asked quietly, and took a step toward the door across from mine.

No reply. My heart thundered in my chest when I reached out and turned the doorknob to peer inside. It was a bedroom but unlike mine which was made up with pretty things, this one only had a bed and a dresser. The walls were bare, the curtains drawn and it felt a lot colder than mine did. On the bed I saw the clothes that Edward had been wearing during breakfast and I knew that this must be his room. But this one looked more like a prison cell than mine did. Why would he fill my room with flowers, books and movies and leave his own dark and depressing? I didn't have time to ponder this because I heard his now familiar soft footsteps on the stairs and ran back into 'my' room before I was discovered snooping.

"I hope you like Italian," Edward said, when he came in seconds later, balancing a loaded tray.

"Yeah, I do," I replied and went to sit down at the table.

I was hungry. Practically starving at this point, and the creamy sauce covering the pasta smelled so good that I didn't even bother to pretend not wanting any of it. Thankfully, Edward had made me a huge serving which I dug into immediately while he stood by the other chair, motionless, until I looked up. It bothered me that I felt rude for simply stuffing my face without waiting for him to join me. Why the hell should I care about that?

"Can I?" he asked and motioned to the empty chair across from me.

I just nodded and went back to eating and ignoring him. I noticed that he lit the tea lights sitting in the window sill and opened a bottle before joining me.

"I'm so glad you like the food," he said, sounding happy.

I resisted rolling my eyes.

"Would you like some wine?" he asked and held up a bottle.

"I'm not really a big drinker," I said.

"Neither am I," he said and poured a little into my glass. "I don't want you to get drunk, just for you to relax and enjoy yourself."

He raised his own glass and smiled.

"To our first night together, Bella. I am so happy that you're here."

And he really was. I could see it in his eyes. He was so happy that he had kidnapped me and was now holding me prisoner. He was practically giddy. There was no way I would ever be able to convince him to let me go. I sucked in a breath to keep myself from crying, yet again, and instead simply looked down at the food I no longer wanted. I couldn't stop, though, and soon big fat tears rolled down my cheeks and onto my hoodie.

"Bella," he sighed and moved out of his chair to kneel next to mine on the floor. "What's the matter, love? Will you please eat a little more and maybe finish your wine?"

His hands grasped mine in my lap and held them gently.

"I want you to tell me if something is bothering you," he said.

_Beside the fact that I have been abducted by a complete psycho?_

"I still don't know what you want from me," I finally answered. "If you wanted to kill me I think you would have done that by now and you already said that you don't want money."

"I just want you here," he replied and stroked the back of my hands with his thumbs.

"Well, you got me here," I sniffed. "Mission accomplished."  
>He didn't say anything.<p>

"Why do you want me here?" I asked. "What could you possibly get out of this? Why can't you just let me go?"

"I just can't," he answered. "I need you here with me."  
>"Why?" I cried. "Why have you done this to me? Why are you forcing me to be here with you? Please, just tell me!"<p>

"Because," he whispered. "Because I love you, Bella."

I felt as though all the air had been sucked out of the room and gasped for breath. He loved me? It was preposterous! I felt a fit of highly inappropriate laughter bubbling up inside me, threatening to spill out. Or maybe it was appropriate to laugh when someone told you something so ridiculous that it actually became funny. Still, I yanked my hands away from Edward to clamp them over my mouth and just stared at him for a minute.

"Please, say something," he pleaded from his spot on the floor.

"What…what do you want me to say?" I whispered, after lowering my hands.

"I don't know," he sighed. "Well, at least you're not laughing at me."

He gave me a sad half smile.

_Good decision not to laugh, then._

"Edward," I started hesitantly. "You can't love me, you don't even know me."

"Yes, I do," he said. "You're smart and kind and beautiful. You have excellent taste in books, movies and music. Your smile can light up the whole room and I hope more than anything that one day you'll love me in return."

"It's impossible," I whispered. "There's no way…I don't even know you."

"I want you to know me," Edward said, very calmly.

"So that's why I'm here?" I asked. "Just to get to know you?"

"Well, I…"

His cheeks colored a little.

"I want us to be together."

"L-like a couple?" I gulped.

Edward nodded.

"I don't expect you to love me back, Bella," he said and reached for my hands again. "I'm not…delusional, despite what you might think. But I'm hoping that you'll give me a chance."

"It's not as though I have any sort of choice in the matter," I said, bitterly.

"Of course you do," Edward answered. "I can never make you love me, but I can do my best to show you how great we can be together – in every way."

_In every way! _

"I know we have lots more to discuss, but maybe we should just take it easy for the rest of the night," Edward said and got up off the floor. "Would you like some more to eat? I also made dessert."

I shook my head.

"No, thank you," I mumbled and watched as he put everything except the wine glasses and the bottle back on the tray.

"I'll just clean this away," he said. "Why don't you change for bed and get comfortable?"

My stomach flipped. This was it. Oh, God. This was it. He would want sex now. I felt so naïve, all of a sudden. How could I not have realized this sooner? Edward had said that he wouldn't rape me, and in his twisted mind I bet he believed that, too. I had been so stupid not to read the signs: The delicious food, the wine, the candles, the revealing nightgown he wanted me to wear, the declaration of his supposed love for me. To him, this was a date and now it was time to consummate the relationship he had imagined having with me.

"I'll be back soon," Edward said with a smile before he left, completely unaware that I was on the verge of another anxiety attack.

_Oh, God. Please help me! I can't do this!_

My mind started hurling disturbing images at me and I wondered how he would do it. Would he make me undress for him or would he rip the flimsy nightgown from my trembling body? Would he try to be gentle and would he care if I cried?

_What if I get pregnant?_

No. I could under no circumstances let that happen. That was worse than anything else Edward could do to me. I could not become pregnant like this.

_But I can't stop him. I won't be able to fight him off. He's so strong and he'll hurt me. Unless…_

The rational side of my brain opted for the hopefully less painful option, and even though it went against everything that I believed in, I knew that I had already chosen: I would do whatever he told me and hope that he would be gentle because I didn't struggle. I knew that this was the exact opposite of everything that the self-defense courses taught but I also had first-hand knowledge of Edward's strength. He could easily hold me down and I was afraid that he would beat me if I struggled against him.

_But he won't be mean if I just let him, will he? He thinks he loves me._

I could work with that. If Edward really believed that he loved me then he wouldn't want to hurt me. I could ask him to be gentle with me and, most importantly, demand that he use protection if he expected me to go along with this.

I was hardly aware of my actions as I stumbled into the bathroom and quickly removed my comfortable clothes to put on the silk nightgown. I looked at myself in the mirror. This was not the reflection I had thought would look back at me on the night when I lost my virginity. I had expected eyes shining with excitement, not ones that were wide with fear. I had hoped for blushing cheeks and not a deathly pale complexion. And most importantly, I had counted on having a heart that raced because I was in love and not one that galloped in panic. Determined to make the best of this ordeal I climbed into bed and waited for Edward's return. He came in and as I looked at the man who was about to take away my innocence all my newfound bravery left me without a trace and I pulled the covers up to my chin. Edward had stopped in the doorway, his eyes moving over me and stopping to rest on my naked shoulders. My stomach dropped when he walked to me and sat down on the edge of the bed, so close that I could smell the subtle cologne he was wearing. My breathing increased when I watched him reach out his hand and hesitate for a moment before his index finger made contact with my skin and he drew a line from just below my ear and all the way down to my shoulder until he reached the thin strap of the nightgown.

"You're so soft," he whispered. "Even softer than the silk."

I closed my eyes and swallowed nervously. What did he want now? I was wholly inexperienced when it came to engaging in anything sexual that involved another person and I was scared that he would be angry and become violent if I didn't do what he wanted.

Suddenly, I felt his lips on my naked shoulder; the unfamiliar sensation made me gasp and my body flinch. I felt Edward pull away immediately.

"W-what do you expect of m-me tonight?" I stuttered.

My voice sounded so frightened, so small.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I shouldn't have."

I still had my eyes closed, breathing raggedly and clutching the bed covers to my chest.

"I thought you didn't like that night gown?" he asked, out of nowhere.

"I-I don't," I whispered. "It's too revealing, but I'll…I'll let you do…it. Just please don't hit me and _please _wear a condom during. I-I w-w-won't struggle."

"No!" Edward said, forcefully. "I'm not, I mean, we're not going to do…_that_. And I would _never_ hit you, Bella – not ever"

"You won't….we're not?" I asked, feeling stunned. "Isn't that what you want?"  
>I opened my eyes to see him looking flushed.<p>

"I want to, of course," he said quickly. "You're so beautiful, and I want…but…no, not tonight. Not like this."

Relief flooded through me and I drew a deep breath.

"And you don't have to wear that thing," he added. "The saleslady picked it out, picked out all the underwear stuff, actually. She said that, um, that girls like those silk night gowns."

"I like pajamas," I said.

Edward nodded.

"I do too," he said. "The ones you had on were nice. They seemed more like you. I'm sorry they got wet. I was raining last night and I was worried you were going to catch cold so I, well, I had to…"

"You took them off me," I finished. "While I was asleep."

"Yes, I had to," Edward said. "But I didn't, err, touch you and I didn't look."

_Liar!_

I narrowed my eyes and couldn't keep my expression neutral.

"I mean, I had to look a little bit to dress you," he amended.

His gaze drifted to my chest and he swallowed audibly.

"You're the most beautiful thing I have ever seen," he said softly.

My eyes snapped up to meet his, now seemingly darker with unbridled lust. It was beyond terrifying to watch.

"Bella, can I kiss you, please?" he whispered and leaned closer.

"No!"

Something flickered across his face. Anger? Sadness? I couldn't tell, but I knew that I shouldn't have denied him so harshly if I wanted to stay unharmed.

"I mean, I'd rather you didn't," I said, all the while wracking my brain for something that might placate him. "I'm…I'm not that kind of girl."

That was the truth, at least.

"Of course," Edward said with a small smile. "I'm glad you're not, Bella. Really, I am."

He drew a breath and moved a little to give me space.

"So, pajamas and Italian are good. Nightgowns and kisses before the first date are bad," he said, summing up what he had apparently learned.

I wanted to scream that he could put 'kidnap innocent girl' in the 'bad' column but of course, I didn't. I wasn't stupid and if I was going to make it out of here alive it was better not to provoke Edward. So far he hadn't done anything to hurt me and I was determined to keep it that way.

"I'll go get your pajamas, okay? I'm sure they're dry by now. Why don't you pick out a movie while I'm gone?" Edward suggested as he stood up and motioned towards the bookcase which was filled with DVDs. He turned to face me as he reached the door.

"Bella?"

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry that I made you think I was going to…well, you know," he said quietly. "We won't do that until you're ready."

_I won't ever be ready for that, you psycho!_

"Thank you for not making me do anything," I responded.

"You're welcome."

He smiled.

"I'm so glad that you're here," he said, sighing happily. "I'll get some dessert for us and then we can watch a movie together, alright?"  
>I nodded mutely, a little stunned that something like a simple movie night could make his whole face light up.<p>

"It will be so good, love, you'll see," he said and flashed me another smile before leaving the room.

_It will be good when I escape and report your crazy ass to the police! Until that happens I just have to play along and act like I've given in. I can do this. I can do this. _

**Aww, he loves her! That's so sweet! Or should it be: Ugh, he loves her? Damn, that's creepy! **

**So, Edward says he isn't delusional. Who believes him?**

**Would you say no if Edward asked to kiss you?**

**Take care until next time! **


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

**Hey everyone, as promised on Facebook, you get another chapter before the weekend. :)**

**Next week I am going home to my parents, mostly to visit my grandmother who is finally out of the hospital. Sadly, I have a feeling that this might be the last time I see her. This obviously means that I won't be able to write next week so don't expect any updates.**

**Thank you for all your wonderful reviews and the support you have given the story, even if the premise is a little unbelievable. And of course a huge thank you to Melanie, my constant companion, who means so much to me and my writing. Leave her love. No one is more deserving of it. **

**Finally, I need to add a warning to this chapter. This story will not contain rape, I promise you that. However, this chapter contains a scene that may be too much for some so please proceed with caution. That's all. Enjoy! **

BPOV

In Edward's absence I turned to the rows of DVDs like he had suggested. I almost laughed at the ludicrousness of the situation. How the hell did you pick out a movie to watch with your kidnapper? Well, anything containing violence and sex was out, obviously, and I really wasn't too keen on a romantic comedy either since it might give Edward the wrong idea. This was not a date, despite how badly he obviously wanted it to be. This was…utter insanity. The horror genre was also not an option since that came too close to the reality of my situation. Edward had been pretty nice so far but there had to be something fundamentally wrong with him and I didn't know how he would react once he realized that I would never, ever love him. How long would that even take? How long before he decided that this was a wasted effort and then what would happen? He couldn't just turn me loose now that I had seen his face. Would he realize that it didn't matter whether or not I loved him because he could force me to be with him, in every way, like he had said? Or would he simply dispose of me? Permanently? I drew calming breaths and willed myself not to cry again. That never did any good.

Edward suddenly came in carrying yet another tray, this one containing two pieces of cake and two mugs of hot chocolate.

"Hey, did you find anything?" he asked with a wide smile and put the tray on the nightstand.

"Um, no," I said and folded my arms across my chest.

I was still just wearing the thin nightgown and felt terribly exposed to his roaming eyes which lingered on my bare legs and naked arms.

"Let's look together," he said and walked up behind me.

I felt him, so close, towering over me and I fought the urge to cringe away when his arms encircled me slowly and pulled me back against him. He wasn't forceful but it didn't do much for the sense of dread that built quickly in the pit of my stomach.

"You have a lot of movies," I whispered.

"Mmm," he hummed and rested his chin on top of my head, highlighting just how tall he was compared to me. "What are you in the mood for, love?"

"I-I don't know."

_Please stop touching me!_

"How about this one?" he asked and pulled out a copy of an eighties teen movie that I had watched about a million times. "It's one of my favorites."

In truth, it was a favorite of mine as well, although now I wasn't so sure how I felt about that. How could I have anything in common with this strange man? I nodded stiffly in agreement and finally it must have registered with Edward that I was extremely uncomfortable because he gave me a light squeeze and then released me with a sigh.

"Sorry," he said softly. "I shouldn't have. It's just so unreal that you're actually here with me and I've wanted to touch you for so long."

I turned and looked up into his face.

"That's okay," I lied. "I know you didn't mean anything by it, but I'm not ready for that…yet."

I had already figured out that it was imperative that I kept Edward happy with me without actually getting into anything physical, and thankfully he accepted my lie with a smile.

"We have all the time in the world," he said, and he sounded so sure that it made my stomach churn with worry. "I forgot your pajamas. Let me go get them and you can start the movie."

When Edward returned I was still trying to get the fancy DVD player to work.

"Here, they're still warm from the dryer," he said with a smile and handed me my pajamas. "Put them on. You'll feel better."

I froze. He wouldn't expect me to change in front of him, would he?

"In the bathroom," Edward clarified, probably after seeing my wide eyes. "I won't come in, I promise."

I nodded and changed at the speed of light, keeping a constant eye on the door which never opened. I did feel a lot better once I was back in my own clothes and more covered up. I think I actually managed to smile a little to myself at the feel of the soft, warm cotton but I hid it away before I rejoined Edward in the bedroom.

"You look beautiful," he said, the moment I walked in and spotted him sitting in bed. "Now you look like the Bella I know."  
>I wanted to tell him that he didn't know me at all, but wisely held my tongue.<p>

"Come on," Edward said, enthusiastically, and lifted the covers to invite me into bed with him.

"I-I don't, I-" I sputtered and took a step back.

"I just want to sit here and watch a movie with you," he said. "Please?"

I didn't feel like I really had much of a choice in the matter and climbed into bed with my heart in my throat.

"Just relax," he said, softly, and put a pillow behind my back before starting the movie.

I tried to calm down as we sat in silence watching, but it was impossible with him being so close.

"Have some cake and hot chocolate," he offered after a few minutes and pointed to the tray.

"Okay, thanks," I answered automatically and reached for the mug.

Its temperature was only slightly above tepid and I found myself wondering what I would have done if it had actually been hot. Could I have thrown it in Edward's face and made a run for it? I would like to think I would be able to do that, but I had my sincere doubts. Violence had never been part of my life and it scared me, but on the other hand it might be necessary to hurt Edward for me to escape one day.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

I flinched and my heart started racing. If he knew what I had just been thinking…I couldn't even imagine what he might do.

"Sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"This whole thing scares me," I whispered, without thinking.

"I know," he replied, sadly.

I was relieved that my slip hadn't angered him but the tension never left the room as we watched the rest of the movie in silence. When the credits started to roll Edward slipped out of bed and stretched with a groan.

"Ready for bed?" he asked.

_Oh, God. No!_

"Um, maybe we could watch another one?" I said, hesitantly. "It's not very late."

"Okay."

A smile lit up his face and it made him look a lot less scary to me.

"Why don't you pick out one this time?" he suggested and put the one we had just watched back in its place.

"Alright," I agreed and joined him at the bookshelf. "But it might take me a while to look through all of these."  
>"Take your time," he said. "I'll be right back."<p>

I watched as he went into the bathroom and smiled at me before he shut the door, and I wondered why he didn't use his own or the one downstairs.

_Maybe he wants us to share this room now that I'm here!_

That would explain why he hadn't decorated his own room across the hall. My eyes drifted towards the door and then it hit me like a bold of lightning.

_He didn't lock the door!_

The door to the room was open and Edward was in the bathroom for at least a minute or two. Was this my chance? Logically, I knew that my time was limited but who knew when I would get an opportunity like this again, if ever?

_I can't go to bed with him after the next movie! I just can't!_

What if he suddenly decided that he didn't want to wait for me to be ready before we moved on to more physical stuff? Without another thought I opened the door to the hall and then I was running. Down the stairs, my eyes darted around until I found the front door and I rushed towards it with my pulse already thundering in my ears.

_Please, God, let it be unlocked!_

It was, and without hesitation I ran without looking back. The cool air gave my skin goose bumps and I remembered that I wasn't wearing any shoes or socks and all I had on was my pajamas. I looked around, desperately seeking someone who could help me but there was no one. Literally. We were in the middle of nowhere. I could see the front yard and beyond it was nothing but darkness. No cars or streetlights. Only darkness. I took a deep breath and ran as fast as I could into the surrounding black of night and behind me I heard Edward's terrifying voice call out for me.

"Bella! Come back! Don't leave me!"

I ran even though it was horrible. I literally couldn't see past my nose, it was so dark. I held my hands out in front of me trying to protect myself from running into something. I hadn't heard Edward again and the thought terrified me. It meant that he was probably chasing me now and needed his breath for running.

"Bella! Please don't do this," I heard close by and the sound of his voice made me stop dead in my tracks.

If I wasn't careful I could risk running into him and I had to figure out where he was before I started moving again.

"Come back! You don't know your way around out here. Please, love, you could fall and hurt yourself!" he shouted. "Just…just please come back to me, I won't hurt you!"

I stood perfectly still and prayed that he would walk in the opposite direction. I had no idea where his voice was coming from probably because I was both panicked and disorientated. I could see the lights from the house in the far distance and decided to double back towards it since Edward was still out here searching for me. I had to find a road and there wasn't anything on this side except trees and darkness.

"Bella! I am not fucking kidding!" Edward roared. "Get your ass back here now or I swear to God you will regret it!"

He was so angry now and it petrified me to think what he would do if he caught me. I only made it a few yards towards the house when suddenly a sharp pain radiated through the bottom of my right foot when I stepped on something. I couldn't stop the yelp that burst through my lips and froze on the spot.

_Oh, fuck._

He must have been so very close because it only took moments for him to reach me; he came running at full speed and without uttering a single word to me he snatched me up into his arms. I started kicking and hitting whatever I could reach.

"NO! NO! Let me go!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "HEEELP!"

In an instant I was slung over his shoulder and he was running with me. I pounded on his back and kicked my feet but it didn't affect him one little bit. Before I knew it we were inside again and in the blink of an eye he was running up the stairs. Inside the now familiar room he put me down on the floor and I somehow managed to stand on my shaking legs when he turned to lock the door.

"That's one mistake I won't be making again," he said with his back still turned.

His voice sounded so foreign and restrained that it made me tremble again. He turned around to face me slowly and at that moment I felt more helpless than I ever had my entire life. I gasped when I looked at him. It was like seeing at a different Edward! His eyes were blazing, his hair was standing out in every direction and he looked furious.

"Why?" he asked, though clenched teeth.

"W-w-why what?" I stuttered and took a step back.

"Why did you run away?"

"I want to go home," I cried. "Please, Edward, please let me go home!"

"This _is _your home now," he said. "Here with me is where you belong."  
>"No," I whispered. "This isn't home. This is a prison."<p>

"It is not!" he exclaimed. "I did this to keep you safe. Do you have any idea what's out there, what I'm protecting you from? I did this for you!"

"But I never asked you to do any of this!" I shouted. "I don't want this, I don't want you."  
>He closed his eyes tightly and shook his head as though my words physically hurt him.<p>

"Don't say that. You can't know that!" he insisted, and grabbed my shoulders. "I just want to spend some time with you, like we did tonight. Why can't you give me that? Do you even know what I'm risking? I'll go to jail for the rest of my life if I'm ever caught!"

"That's where you belong!" I snarled. "I will never love you, you sick son of a bitch, not ever. You might as well kill me now and get it over with because it will never happen!"

_What am I saying? I don't want to die!_

"Stop it! Just fucking stop!" he yelled and tightened his grip on my shoulders.

"Let go of me! I will never love you! Never! Never!" I screamed into his face and before I really knew what I was doing I slapped him hard across his cheek.

Immediately, I knew I had just made a horrible mistake; Edward's nostrils flared and his eyes seemed to darken with rage.

"Don't say that!" he yelled, sounding both desperate and angry. "You have to, Bella, because I love you so much and without you I don't have anything."

I stumbled as he propelled me backwards and fell gracelessly onto the bed, unable to stop him when he moved to lie on top of me.

"Let me up!" I demanded and kicked my legs, trying to hurt him. "Don't touch me!"

"Stop trying to get away from me!" he roared and pressed his body against mine to cease my struggling while he grabbed my hands and held them tightly.

We stared at each other for a second and then, without warning, he smashed his lips against mine. It took me by complete surprise and I even forgot to struggle for a moment. He pushed his tongue into my mouth and he moaned loudly. I felt him shift his weight on top of me and his left hand now held on to both of my wrists, pinning me down while his right hand travelled down my body; over the swell of my breast, down to my butt and finally lifting my leg over his hip as though we were lovers. My protests were muffled by his mouth when he started fumbling with the buttons on my pajama top, trying to open it. Finally, he grabbed the collar and yanked roughly until I felt the buttons pop out and then his large hand on my naked chest.

"Oh, God!" he moaned and moved his mouth to my neck. "I love you so much, Bella. Let me make you feel good. Please, let me love you."

Tears welled up in my eyes at the hopelessness of the situation. I was nowhere near strong enough to physically remove Edward but I had to stop this now before it was too late. He seemed to be on the verge of frenzy and there was no doubt in my mind that he would not stop on his own.

"Edward," I sobbed. "Please don't. Please don't hurt me! You promised that you wouldn't hurt me!"

He stopped kissing my neck and his head shot up. He looked disoriented for a second as if he didn't know where he was. Then he blinked and looked at me again. The transformation on his face happened instantly. The look of confusion was replaced with horror. In a flash he was off me, standing by the foot of the bed with both his hands clamped over his mouth, his eyes wide. He started shaking his head violently as his hands went into his hair. He looked at me again.

"No," he whispered. "Please, God. No!"

I watched in astonishment as he backed away from the bed and fell to his knees. He buried his face in his hands and he began sobbing violently. The whole scene was so unreal that I didn't know what to think or do. I slowly sat up on the bed, holding my ripped top together and watched the man in front of me disintegrate into a pile of raw emotion. He started beating his head with his fists and cried like I had never seen anyone do before.

"Why?" he wailed. "Why did I do that? How could I do that to her? I love her and now she won't ever…I ruin everything! I hate you, I fucking hate you, you ugly, worthless piece of shit!"

His whole frame shook with sobs as he kept hitting himself, screaming how he hated himself. The sound of his agony made my heart ache. It was beyond horrible to watch how much he loathed himself and I knew somehow that it wasn't just because of what had happened tonight. This sort of self-hatred didn't develop in a few minutes.

_What happened to him? _

I was scared, so scared. I had to calm him down immediately before he really ended up hurting himself and possibly me, as well. I swallowed my fear as best I could and I felt myself stand up and approach him. I stood perfectly still in front of him as he knelt on the floor still holding on to his hair so tightly that it made his knuckles turn white. My hand shook slightly when I reached out and placed it on his shoulder. His head immediately shot up and he looked at me in wonder and disbelief. Tears were streaming down his face and before I knew it he reached around the back of my thighs and pulled me to him. He rose up on his knees, pressing his face against the naked skin on my chest.

"Bella. Oh God, I'm so sorry," he choked out and started crying again.

I stood completely frozen on the spot as Edward held on to me tightly. I didn't know if it was the right thing to do, but I just couldn't make myself move away from him in that moment.

Edward suddenly looked up at me again with desperation painted all over his face, his eyes pleading with me.

"Please forgive me, Bella. I don't know what came over me. I never meant to hurt you. That's the last thing I wanted to do. You have to forgive me or I'll die. Please, Bella, please!" He ranted as new tears filled his eyes.

"I'll do anything for you if you just stay here with me. Please don't leave me, Bella. I can't be alone anymore! I _need_ you! Please stay with me! I'm so sorry, love. Oh God, I'm so sorry!"

At that moment I could see past the scary strange man who had snatched me from my home, and instead I saw a lonely, lost boy. Could I forgive him? I didn't know. It wouldn't change the fact that he was keeping me here against my will and that I was still afraid of him.

No, not afraid of the man in front of me. But I quivered with fear when I thought about the Edward who had caught me outside and yelled at me before he kissed me against my will. Rationally, I knew they were the same person and yet they weren't. This Edward wouldn't hurt me. I didn't know where that certainty came from, but I couldn't deny it.

"Just…just calm down," I whispered and moved my trembling hand up to stroke his hair.

He rested the side of his face against my chest and closed his eyes, listening to my heartbeat, and in any other situation the tenderness of the gesture would have made me smile. Not now, though. Now, I just needed Edward to calm down to ensure my own safety. He swayed a little on his knees and tightened his hold on me to steady himself.

"I'm so tired, love," he slurred. "So tired."

"You should sleep then," I whispered.

"Okay," he nodded against my chest and after a moment he stumbled to his feet.

He reached for my hand and when he tugged me towards the bed again I started to panic.

"No, don't-" I started.

"Just to sleep," he said quickly and watched me with sad bleary eyes. "I don't want to be alone. Can I please stay with you?"  
>"I…"<p>

_This is madness!_

"_Please_," he implored, sounding upset again. "I won't do anything, I promise."

_Don't get him all worked up again!_

"Okay," I whispered.

The look of relief on his face was beyond noticeable and his hunched shoulders relaxed. He crawled into bed, thankfully keeping all his clothes on and lay down on his side, giving me an expectant look.

"I…I need the bathroom," I whispered.

He merely nodded and closed his eyes as I left the bedroom and shut the door between us.

_Oh, God!_

I turned on the water in the sink to hide my muffled sobs. My hands shook and I couldn't take a deep calming breath to save my life. I had been so close to escaping! I had almost made it out and now I was forced to spend the night with Edward. I looked down at my pajama top and burst into tears again when I remembered how he had torn it open. I was so grateful that he had stopped when he did but it didn't make what he _had_ done any less scary. I couldn't ever upset Edward like that again. Next time I might not be able to stop him and I knew that it would be a long while before he started trusting me again and became forgetful about locking the door. So I had to play along and be complacent. Edward obviously felt bad about how he had reacted to my escape attempt and I didn't think he would ever try something like that again as long I stayed put. Could I really do that? Just stay, be obedient and bide my time until the perfect opportunity revealed itself? I didn't know.

"Bella?"

Edward's sleepy muffled voice cut into my thoughts.

"Just a minute," I called, in my bravest voice.

I used the toilet, brushed my teeth with the one toothbrush by the sink and washed the tears off my face before I went back into the bedroom. Edward was still lying on his side with his eyes closed but the moment he heard me they popped open and locked with mine. It was the strangest thing: He was so big and strong and yet at that moment he looked utterly frail and scared with his puffy eyes and messed up hair. I hesitated by the edge of the bed, trying to get a read on his emotions. He was obviously tired and it made me wonder if he had stayed up watching me the whole night after bringing me here. But most of all he just looked sad, like he could cry again at any moment.

"Bella," he croaked.

I held up my hand to stop him. I couldn't listen to him apologize and cry anymore tonight and instead I slowly crawled underneath the covers and lay down as close to the edge as possible.

"Can I please hold your hand?"

His voice sounded garbled, on the verge of tears. I rolled onto my side facing him and slowly reached my hand out across the empty space between us. Edward grasped it immediately and laced our fingers, practically clinging to it in the darkness.

"Thank you. Thank you, love," he whispered. "Goodnight."

I didn't answer. I couldn't. If I did it would mean an acknowledgment of the fact that, even though I didn't want to, I did feel sorry for Edward. It was so typical of me, really. When I was a kid, before mom passed away, I would always bring home wounded animals or abandoned cats and dogs, and beg my parents to let me nurse them back to health and find new homes for them. Usually, they let me. I knew that I was a caregiver who had a soft spot for sad, wounded creatures, always had been, but now it worked against me. I didn't want to feel an ounce of sympathy for Edward, because no matter how lonely he was, that was no excuse for kidnapping someone. I had to hate him. I had to.

"I love you, Bella," Edward whispered.

_I hate you, Edward._

But in my heart I couldn't gather up the animosity that my thoughts were meant to express. Hating Edward was going to be a challenge.

**So, was it bad? Did you flounce when you read it? **

**What do you think happened to Edward? (that's for new readers, by the way. You seasoned readers know, of course, since you read the original version).**

**How will things progress from here? Can Bella actively hate Edward after witnessing his breakdown? Stay tuned. (And leave me a review if you feel like it. They are seriously like crack to me!) ;)**

**Take care until next time. **


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyers.

**A nice long chapter coming to you today, courtesy of my mom's computer and Melanie's overnight beta job. Thank you, my lovely friend. :)**

**Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers regarding my grandmother. She's happy to be home but very weak and helpless. It's heartbreaking to see her like that.**

**I hope you enjoy this chapter and I promise you to get back to my other stories, as well. **

BPOV

I opened my eyes and blinked a few times to get my vision to focus.

_Shit!_

I flinched and my heart started hammering when I looked into the face of the man sleeping next to me, so close that I could feel his breath softly fanning across my forehead through his parted lips.

_Edward. My kidnapper._

During the night he had moved across the bed and was now lying just inches from me, his arm curled over my waist. He was holding me prisoner even in his sleep. Last night I had stayed awake for a long time just looking at his face in the dark room. His hand never let go of mine and I didn't think I could slip out of the bed and sleep on the floor like I had decided, without waking Edward. I couldn't remember having fallen asleep but I felt oddly well rested considering my circumstances. I took stock of my body; I needed to pee and also noticed a familiar dull ache in my abdomen which could only mean one thing.

_Great. Just what I need._

I slithered out of bed slowly, careful not to wake Edward, but the second I put my feet on the floor I felt a twinge of pain. Thankfully, I was able to hold in the pained whimper that almost escaped as I hobbled into the bathroom and shut the door. My feet were dirty from running around outside last night and I was pretty sure that I must have stepped on a sharp rock right before Edward caught me.

I didn't know if it was wise to say something to Edward about my injury. Wouldn't it just remind him of my escape attempt and make him angry again? I wouldn't risk that for anything! My trip to the toilet confirmed my suspicion and I sighed heavily before looking around for what I needed. There was plenty of toilet paper and towels in the cupboard but that didn't really help my situation. I found extra toothpaste and unopened bottles of shampoo and conditioner, exactly like the ones I used at home. How the hell did he know that?

_He has been in my__ apartment before._

I wished I hadn't thought of that the second the realization hit me. Of course, he had been there before. How else would he know my clothing sizes? I didn't want to think about that anymore, it was simply too frightening and I needed to calm down before he woke up. Unsuccessful, I ended up shoving a wad of rolled up toilet paper in my underwear before I opened the door and peered into the bedroom. Edward was still asleep, now on his back, his long arms and legs stretched out. He looked peaceful and so…not dangerous.

_But he _is _dangerous! Last night ring any bells?_

I merely needed to look down at my torn pajama top to remind myself just how dangerous and unstable Edward was. I still couldn't believe all that had happened last night, especially the part where Edward had cried at my feet while begging for forgiveness. It was beyond strange to see him like that and I hadn't even felt afraid of him during those moments. I was now, though. How long before I would see him so enraged and out of control again? I could sort of handle the soft spoken and attentive Edward who obviously believed that he loved me; the one who cooked for me and seemed happy just to spend time in the same room as me. _He_ wasn't out to hurt me, but when he became angry it was something else entirely.

I grabbed my clothes from last night and snuck back into the bathroom to dress, cringing when I pulled the socks over my filthy feet. I hated being dirty but there was no way in hell I was undressing and getting in the shower while Edward was right outside the door, possibly waking up and feeling just as angry as he had last night before his breakdown.

I re-entered the bedroom and stopped abruptly in the doorway when I saw that Edward was stirring. Suddenly, he sat up and looked around, frantic. When he saw me he visibly relaxed but looked away again at once. He cleared his throat.

"I'll go make you some breakfast," he said quietly and cleared the table from last night before he left the bedroom without another sound, except for the lock being turned in the door.

I sat down on the edge of the bed and waited for his return. When he did, it was in the same somber way that he had left. He placed the tray on the table by the window and opened the curtains without looking in my direction. Then he walked towards the door without asking to join me, as he had done consistently the day before. I didn't like it. Not one bit. Why was be behaving like this? Had he finally come to understand that I wouldn't love him no matter what and now he was getting ready to dispose of me? Or was he getting ready to dole out his punishment for my trying to leave? Either way, this was bad, and my stomach churned with worry as well as hunger when I sat down and ate my breakfast quietly while barely holding back my tears.

Edward knocked on the door about an hour later and found me staring longingly out of the window while I drank my third cup of coffee.

"You done?" he whispered as he entered the room.

I nodded and watched as he once again cleared the table and walked to the door, leaving me to my solitude.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked, before I could stop myself.

He turned around immediately.

"No," he said quietly.

"Then why are you…"

"Why am I what?" he asked.

It felt ridiculous saying it but I couldn't come up with a better expression.

"Why are you giving me the silent treatment if you're not angry?"

"The silent…Bella, I'm not mad at you, I swear," he said.

"Then why are you acting like this?" I demanded and rose from the table. "You're scaring me!"

"I'm…ashamed of myself. I'm so ashamed," Edward said and looked down to hide his face. "I figured you wanted me to leave you alone, so I did."

"So you're not going to…punish me?" I whispered.

"No, of course not," Edward said and shook his head. "I'll clear this away and come back in a moment. Is that alright?"  
>I nodded slowly. I didn't like silent, somber Edward. He seemed volatile underneath the surface and sad, talking Edward was much less scary. After he left I made another trip to the bathroom to replace the toilet paper. I was really starting to feel the cramps now but I was unsure how to talk to Edward about something as intimate as that.<p>

_You just have to do it! He kidnapped you and now it's his responsibility to make sure you don't bleed all over the place! _

Determined, I went back into the bedroom just as Edward returned.

"Why are you walking like that?" he gasped. "Are you in pain?"

_Shit!_

"Yeah, I…I stepped on something last night," I admitted. "Um, outside."

I looked at his face, expecting to see a smug expression that would say 'serves you right for trying to run away', but there was nothing but concern on Edward's features.

"Can I look?" he asked.

"Okay," I nodded and sat down on the edge of the bed to remove my sock.

"Your feet," Edward said and shook his head. "You should take a shower or a bath first."

"No!" I exclaimed and curled my arms into my chest, clutching my hoodie, as though Edward would rip it off me without warning.

"Okay, okay," he said calmly and held up his hands. "Um, wait here."  
>He came back a few minutes later, carrying a bowl with warm soapy water which he placed in front of me. He knelt down and reached for my feet, then hesitated.<p>

"Can I?" he whispered and looked up.

He seemed apprehensive, nervous, but I couldn't find anything sinister in his expression. I nodded stiffly and he removed my other sock with the gentlest touch before lowering both my feet into the water. I could almost feel the grime dissolving and sighed while Edward dipped his hand into the bowl for a sponge.

"Bella," he said softly and reached for my left foot to clean it. "I…I wanted to talk to you about last night. About what I almost…"

I tensed. Had he been lying about not wanting to punish me?

"I'm so, so sorry," he continued, still looking down. "I know you probably don't believe me, but I'm really not a violent person. I've never hit anyone and I've…I've never _ever_ done what I almost…"

He shook his head and lifted his hand to wipe his eyes before continuing.

"I'm so ashamed of myself, love, and I won't ask you to forgive me because what I did, I know it's unforgivable. I just hope that maybe someday you'll…you won't be afraid of me anymore."

"Why did you do it?" I whispered.

"I don't know," he said, brokenly. "I don't know how I could _ever_…I didn't want to have sex, I swear. I wanted to touch you and make you feel good. But I wouldn't ever have forced you to…I just wanted to touch you."

"But that's almost as bad," I said, bravely.

"I know," he nodded. "I know that. I won't ever touch you like that again against your will, I swear to God."

I didn't know if I could believe him so I said nothing while he washed off my right foot.

"Ow!" I gasped and tried to retract it when he washed the sole.

"Sorry," he said quietly. "Let me look."

He lifted my foot and studied it carefully, touching it gently to see if there was anything under the skin, a look of intense concentration on his face.

"It's just a small cut," he said, sounding relieved. "I need to go out and get you a bandage to wrap around it. Is there anything else you need?"

I hesitated. How on earth did I ask him for this? I had never ever discussed the intricacies of the womanly cycle with a guy before and I felt mortified.

"Anything at all," he insisted.

"Yes, there is something," I finally admitted. "I'm…"

_Bleeding? Menstruating? On the rag?_

"It's, um, it's about that time of the month," I finally managed to say.

"What time?" he asked with a frown.

_Oh, God!_

"I'm…you know," I said and glanced down to my lap. "My period."

"Oh!"

Edward's eyes widened and his cheeks colored a bright red.

"You're…Oh, of course, I mean, you're…Yes, I understand, I…But I didn't buy any…God, I'm an idiot!"

He jumped to his feet, looking flustered.

"Idiot!" he scolded himself and looked at me again. "What other kinds of girl stuff do you need that I didn't get you?"

"I don't know," I whispered, not wanting to upset him.

"Please just tell me," he pleaded. "I feel horrible, love. I never should have gone to bed without checking your foot first and now I realize that I didn't even get you the bare essentials that you need!"

"I need, uh, tampons and pads," I said.

"Okay, anything else?"

"Painkillers?" I asked, looking up at him. "You know for cramps?"  
>"Cramps," he croaked. "Right, sure. Um, I have some downstairs that you can have now."<p>

He practically fled the room and was gone for a few minutes before he returned with the pills and a glass of water. I was relieved to see the writing on the pills, and knowing that they really were just for pain, I swallowed them gratefully.

"How about a heating pad?" Edward asked. "Do you need that? Or maybe something special you like to snack on during that time of the month? Um, some think that a warm bath helps too. Or a lower back massage."

_Well, look who's a library of information all of a sudden._

I narrowed my eyes and watched him closely as he practically squirmed.

"Did you just Google pain relief for cramps when you were downstairs?" I asked.

"Busted," he grinned nervously. "I'm sorry. I don't want you in pain and I really don't know anything about that…stuff."  
>Even taking away the kidnapping there was no doubt in my mind that Edward was the strangest person I had ever met. But on the other had it was somehow a relief to see that his reaction to my period was similar to that of any other man. Well, at least the one man. I remembered vividly how Charlie had reacted when I had started bleeding at thirteen and he was the one who had to buy me my first pads. Awkward didn't even begin to describe it and it was the same now.<p>

"Anything else you need?" Edward asked. "Anything at all, Bella. I mean that."

I didn't know what to say, really. Sure, I always had a craving for chocolate when I had my period and Edward hadn't bought a lot of the stuff I normally used in the bathroom but I couldn't see myself asking for any of that. Nice Edward was back and I wasn't about to piss him off with requests for cotton balls and disposable razors.

"Just a second," Edward said out of nowhere and walked out of the room only to return carrying a notepad and a pencil.

He handed them to me, fetched a towel and knelt on the floor again to wipe my feet.

"Just write down anything you want or need and I'll get it for you, I promise," he said. "Don't hesitate, please?"  
>"Okay," I nodded slowly and started writing while Edward moved the water out of the way and finished drying my feet.<p>

"They're so small," he mused and ran his thumbs across the arches of my feet. "And delicate. You have really beautiful feet, Bella."

"Um, thanks, I guess," I said, feeling awkward and pulled them up underneath me.

"You don't think of yourself as beautiful, do you?" Edward asked and leaned back on his hands while studying me closely.

I shook my head and continued writing the strange shopping list, trying to ignore Edward's scrutiny. It turned out to be impossible.

"I think one of my favorite things about you is your hair. It's so incredibly soft," he sighed. "It feels like the finest silk when you run your hands through it, and the color is amazing. It's brown and red and gold all at once, and in the sunlight-"

"Please, just stop already!" I snapped and held up my hand to shut him up. "Your impromptu ode to my hair is making me really uncomfortable, so just stop!"

_Oh, God!_

"I-I'm sorry," I stuttered and moved back on the bed, away from his immediate proximity.

"Well, I guess that website was right about women being a little irritable that time of the month," Edward said slowly.

"I…what?" I sputtered.

"Are you done with your list?" he asked.

"You're not angry?" I whispered.

"No," Edward said. "I won't do anymore odes to your hair if it makes you uncomfortable. That's fine."

"It is?"  
>He nodded and smiled.<p>

"I don't want you to be afraid to ever say what's on your mind," he said.

"But last night," I said.

"I'm so sorry about that," Edward said and rose up on his knees. "You can't imagine what I would do to be able to take that back. I don't what possessed me to do something so horrible."  
>"I hit you," I whispered, unable to keep my mouth shut.<p>

"You had every right," Edward sighed. "I shouldn't have grabbed your shoulders. I made a terrible mistake. I'm really not…like that."

He looked up at me, his green eyes pleading.

"Are you afraid of me?" he asked.

I drew a deep breath.

"Not right now," I said, truthfully. "I don't trust you, but…no, I'm not really afraid when you're like this."

"Thank God," Edward breathed and dropped his head for a moment before looking at me again. "That means so much to me, you have no idea."

I nodded wordlessly and handed him the list, a little worried about my requests. He barely glanced at it before he rose to his feet and put it in his pocket.

"Hey, how about I bring back a pizza for lunch?" he suggested excitedly.

"Um, okay," I said, feeling a little stunned about this whole conversation. "Will you be gone that long? I just had breakfast."

"Two or three hours," he said. "You will have complete privacy."  
>He looked at the door to the bathroom pointedly. It was obvious that he had picked up on my reluctance to get in the shower even though I really wanted one at this point.<p>

"Okay," I said again.

"There are plenty of clothes in the closet for you," Edward added.

I merely nodded.

"So I'll go now and come back later?" He asked. "Is that alright?"

"Yeah, sure," I mumbled

"Do you need anything before I go? Something to drink?"

I shook my head.

"Is something wrong?" he whispered.

"Why are you being so…I don't know, normal and…nice, even, especially compared to last night?" I asked. "It's like you have multiple personalities or something."  
>"I don't," he answered, seriously. "This is me, Bella. Last night was me, as well, but I was scared and I wasn't thinking. It won't ever happen again. I will never force you to kiss me, or be with me like that, I promise."<p>

"I don't know if I can believe you," I admitted, feeling brave.

"I know," Edward sighed. "I probably wouldn't believe me either if I were you. I can only keep telling you how sorry I am for scaring you like that."

"And I really _am_ sorry," he added.

"I believe you."

_But I still don't trust you._

"Thank you, love," he said, smiling. "I'll see you later, okay?"

"Okay," I nodded.

He left hereafter, unfortunately remembering to lock the door this time. I waited for the sound of a car starting up but it never came which I thought was strange. The house was quiet, eerily so. I went into the bathroom, turned on the shower and then waited to see if Edward was going to break his promise and come barging in on me, thinking that I was naked. He didn't. Nothing happened and after a good ten minutes I was starting to feel ridiculous just staring at the water running down the drain. Finally, after drawing a deep breath, I grabbed the basic shower things, undressed and stepped under the water. It was probably the quickest shower of my life, but it was nice just the same.

As promised, I found plenty of brand new clothes in the closet. Their styles were casual, which was what I preferred, but they were all designer labels that I could never have afforded myself. Just how much money had Edward spent before bringing me here? A lot, by the looks of it. And he didn't seem to care about the price of the stuff I had put on the list, either. It was weird.

_This whole morning has been weird!_

Nothing had gone like I had expected. We actually managed to have a fairly civilized conversation. How the hell did that happen? I had no idea. But I did know that Edward was a lot less scary in the light of day. And he did seem sincere in his many, many apologies. I didn't know what to think about the whole thing.

After I dressed and had to resort to using more toilet paper as a makeshift pad, I looked for a hairdryer but came up empty. Of course, he wouldn't have thought about that either and I had to let it air dry which made it curl.

_I bet Edward could compose a sonnet about it if the mood struck him._

I rolled my eyes, remembering how he had talked about my hair. I knew I wasn't beautiful, at least not in the conventional sense. I was too pale, my figure resembled that of a young teenager with long gangly legs and small breasts, and my nose turned up slightly at the end. Why couldn't Edward see all that? It really did seem as though he believed that I was beautiful which was strange, at best, because he was so good-looking himself. He wasn't perfect either, though. A few of his teeth were a little crooked, his nose had a small bump on it and his hair, which I had mistaken for innocuous brown was actually more of the ginger variety in daylight. Still, he was undoubtedly handsome, and I really wasn't sure how I felt about. Shouldn't I find him absolutely repulsive?

In Edward's absence, I stupidly tried to see if I could open the door. Of course, I couldn't do that. It was made of strong sturdy wood which my small frame could do no damage to. I had to wait until Edward trusted me enough again to leave it unlocked. I wondered how long a time that might take and it brought tears to my eyes for the first time that day.

Sad and frustrated, I turned to my usual escape from life and looked at all of Edward's books. He had everything from classics to brand new releases and I curled up in bed with one until his return. My heart leapt when I heard faint noises from a car approaching a few hours later and I ran to the window to look outside. I couldn't see it, though, and soon hereafter I heard Edward's familiar footsteps on the stairs, telling me that he was back.

"Hey," he said, smiling widely as he came in. "I just need to get the groceries in from the car, but I wanted to let you know that I was back."

"The car?"

"Yeah, the damn thing broke down the other night. It was parked down the road and all it needed was a new battery. It was lucky I had one lying around," he said and handed me a large shopping bag.

I peered into it, seeing most of the stuff I asked for.

"Thank you for the list," Edward said. "It was very helpful."

"Sure, no problem," I mumbled and shifted my weight.

"Oh, and I also got you this," he said and revealed what he had been hiding behind his back. "You wanted chocolate, right?"

He handed me an expensive looking box of assorted treats like the kind you might get on Valentine's Day if your date was loaded. Or at least I imagined that it would be like that, having never had a date on that particular holiday.

"Is it okay?" he asked, anxiously.

"Uh, yes," I answered. "I just meant like a snickers bar or something like that. Didn't this cost a lot?"

"Just fifty dollars," Edward shrugged.

"You spent fifty dollars on chocolate?" I gasped. "That's…"

_Insane!_

"…very generous of you."

He just stood there, beaming at me.

"This is weird," I blurted out.

"Yeah, I know," Edward nodded. "Hopefully you won't always feel that way."  
>"Does it even matter?" I whispered.<p>

"Bella," he said softly. "I want you to be happy. That's all I've ever wanted for you."

"I was happy at home," I said, feeling defiant. "I was happy before you took me."

"No, I don't think you were," Edward said, shaking his head. "You never did anything besides working and studying, you must have worried about paying your bills constantly and you always looked so exhausted."

"How dare you?" I seethed. "How dare you make assumptions about my life when you know nothing about it! I _was_ happy! I was free and I could do whatever I wanted. I wasn't a prisoner in a golden cage!"

Before Edward could respond, I lost my nerve and stormed into the bathroom, slamming the door behind me. I stood completely still, praying that he wouldn't come barging in after me to yell at me. The seconds ticked by and thankfully I was left alone. Sniffing back my tears I quickly used one of the pads that Edward had bought and then sat down on the toilet lid to calm my nerves. After a few minutes I stood again and opened the door to the bedroom, not sure what I would find.

Edward sat on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands but looked up when he heard me. He didn't look angry. He looked sad.

"I ruin everything," he whispered. "I can't even have a short conversation with you without saying the wrong thing."

I didn't respond and stayed at a distance which made him look even sadder.

"And now you're scared of me again."

"You can't blame me for feeling that way," I said. "I haven't forgotten what happened last night. I don't think I ever will."

"I won't ever do that again, I swear!" Edward said, forcefully. "Never!"

I didn't say anything.

"Can we just…start over?" he asked.

"Start over from where?" I asked, coldly.

"I don't know," Edward sighed. "I'm sorry I said what I said about your life. You're right; I don't know how it was for you. But I want to know. I really do. I want to take care of you."

"I can take care of myself," I muttered and crossed my arms over my chest.

"Of course you can," Edward agreed. "You're very capable. Maybe you'd just like to relax a little and let someone spoil you? That's all I want to do."

"How?" I asked and narrowed my eyes at him. He smiled widely.

I spent the afternoon lounging on the bed, eating pizza and delicious chocolate while alternating between watching the movie on the TV screen and Edward who sat in a chair next to the bed, eating and smiling blissfully the entire time. With my permission, he lifted my feet into his lap, bandaged the cut and spent close to an hour gently rubbing both of them until I was so relaxed that I almost fell asleep against the soft pillows. Edward was attentive, soft-spoken and beyond eager to please. It was both strange and confusing. I knew I shouldn't buy this supposed act but I just wasn't scared of him when he was like this and as our afternoon together came to an end, I realized something that startled me.

_I'm supposed to hate him but I'm not sure I can if he keeps this __up. This Edward is sort of…nice. _

**Could you hate Edward who does all the house work, buys you chocolate and gives you foot rubs? :)**

**I promise you that Edward was truthful when he denied having multiple personalities. He doesn't. I'm not saying that he doesn't have serious issues but he's not crazy like that. **

**You seasoned readers are probably thinking: Where's my EPOV, woman?**** It's coming, I promise. There won't be as many of them as there was in the original because I don't really like writing multiple POVs anymore, but some are necessary in this case. (If nothing else, it might convince you that Edward isn't a psycho killer, at least. He's just a 'harmless' kidnapper) ;)**

**Take care until next time. :) **


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

**Hey everyone, a little more for you. :)**

**Thank you for all of your reviews and I must apologize for not responding to all of them. I swear that I read and treasure them all! On that note I need to remind you that if you have your PMs turned off I can't respond to a review or a PM that you send me. Also, I won't respond to messages asking about why I haven't updated this and this story because the answer will always be: Because I am busy. Updates are coming as quickly as possible, I promise. If it were up to me I would write every single day but unfortunately that's not how real life works, and I only have a few hours a week to dedicate to my fics. It hurts me as much as it hurts you to have to wait, I swear. **

**Thank you to Melanie, who is fantastic, and always manages to beta my chapters overnight despite the fact that her beta skills are in high demand with other great writers in the fandom. :) Leave her some love too.**

**That's all. Enjoy! :)**

BPOV

"Do you want to watch another movie?" Edward asked.

"Ugh, no," I moaned and fell backward until I was stretched out on the bed.

I couldn't keep doing this. A few days had passed since Edward had asked if we could start over and they had gone by peacefully. Well, as peacefully as could be expected for someone in my situation. Nothing major had happened and for that I was extremely grateful. Edward had been happy which meant that he had been nice to me. He hadn't once raised his voice and I hadn't felt scared of being in the same room with him. He had brought us meal after delicious meal, he had gotten a hold of everything I had asked for and he had slept in the bed with me, without ever touching me inappropriately. He held my hand every night but that was the extent of our physical relationship and I was relieved to see that my plan of simply cooperating was working and I hadn't been harmed at all. Still, I was getting frustrated with Edward.

Whenever I spoke he would hang on my every word, but if I asked him about even the smallest thing he would tense up. Usually, he would answer me if the subject was something superficial like what types of music he preferred, but whenever I tried to steer the topic towards his personal life he would freeze up. So far, I hadn't been brave enough to push the subject.

"Is something wrong?" Edward asked and turned off the TV from his usual seat next to the bed.

"I just," I sighed.

"What?"

"I'm bored out of my skull!" I complained. "I can't just sit here and watch movies all day, Edward. Aren't you bored already?"

"No," he said, quietly. "I'm…used to it, I guess."

"Oh."

I didn't know how to respond to that. There were, of course, a million questions that I wanted to ask him like, why are you used to it? How can you afford all of this when you don't work? And, why are you living here in the middle of nowhere all alone? Why haven't you made or received a single phone call? And the one I wanted to know the most: Why me? But the sad truth was that I was scared to do so. I wanted Edward to feel comfortable around me so that he would eventually let his guard down and then maybe start keeping the door unlocked again. If I pushed him I feared that I might get another glimpse of angry Edward and I much preferred the one I had spent the last few days with.

"Well, I'm not used to sitting around all the time," I sighed and sat back up on the bed. "I need to do something that doesn't involve the TV or a book, or I'll lose my mind."

"Of course," Edward nodded and rose from the chair. "I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking."

He looked around the room for something but apparently came up empty.

"Um, do you want to go downstairs and have lunch?" he suggested, unsurely.

"Yes!" I jumped from the bed immediately, causing Edward to smile. "Yes, let's get out of this room!"

"Why didn't you just say that you wanted to go downstairs?" he asked.

"Uh, I don't know," I lied.

"Bella," Edward sighed.

"I didn't think I was allowed," I admitted.

"You are," he said. "You're not a guest here, love. You can go wherever you want."

_Except home. And I know you think that this is it, but it's not. This is not my home!_

But I wisely held my tongue. I was going stir crazy in the bedroom and I wasn't about to jeopardize the trip downstairs by telling Edward what I had already said many times.

"Let's go then," he said with another smile and held out his hand to me.

_Fine._

I suppressed a sigh and let Edward lace our fingers before he unlocked the door and led me downstairs. I wasn't sure if it was just because I had been locked up in the bedroom for so long but the house was absolutely beautiful. I came from a modest background and had never been in a house quite like this before.

"Kitchen," Edward said and motioned for me to go inside.

It was sleek and modern with brand new appliances, but at the same time entirely void of personality. It looked like a kitchen you would find in a model home. There were no notes on the fridge, no pictures, no life, really.

"Some flowers would be nice here," I thought out loud as I stood by the breakfast nook and noticed the empty windowsill.

"Which kind?" Edward asked eagerly.

"Um, I don't know," I shrugged. "Something colorful like purple Canterbury Bells or maybe pink Azaleas."

"Done," Edward grinned. "I'll get them the next time I go out. Put them on the list?"

"Yeah, sure," I nodded.

"Come on," he said and tugged on my hand. "The tour continues."

"Living room," he announced a few moments later.

"Whoa," I breathed out.

Again, the place was furnished with expensive looking things like a huge couch which looked extremely comfortable, rows of books, CDs and movies and a ridiculously large entertainment center like the ones you would see on MTV's show Cribs. But underneath all the luxury there was the same air of something acutely depressing. There were no rugs, throw pillows or blankets to make the place homier and not a picture in sight. It felt cold and impersonal, and as much as I hated to admit it, the thought of Edward sitting here all alone watching TV night after night made me feel sad for him. At least at my place I had stuff to make it cozier when I was able to take a break from my school work and just relax.

"Candles would be nice," I said. "And a few blankets and pillows."

_What the hell am I doing? Playing decorator?_

"Of course," Edward said without hesitation. "You're right, that does sound nice. Maybe I should go out this afternoon and get them to make everything perfect for tonight."

"Tonight?" I asked. "What's tonight?"

Edward's cheeks colored a little.

"Well, it's Friday and I'd like to take you out on a date. Figuratively speaking, of course."

"It's Friday?"

"We don't have to," Edward said. "I just thought it would be nice."

"No, that's not it," I murmured distractedly, as my mind started racing. "I had plans…back home."

_It's Friday.__ Oh, God. I have a date tonight and when I don't show up for it people will start looking for me! _

I was suddenly completely grateful that I had agreed to go out with Mike Newton tonight. Mike and I took a course together in American literature and we had talked a little before class, but other than that I didn't know him at all. I knew _of_ him, though. He was on the basketball team and was able to attend university because he was a good player and because his family was extremely well off financially. He definitely wasn't there because of his academic achievements. In fact, he was probably the least scholarly person that I had ever met while studying, and he didn't seem to care about our class or reading literature at all. It was safe to say that he definitely wasn't my type. Still, he was nice enough when he wasn't hanging around his jock buddies and he seemed to like me. When he had asked me to go to the party I had been a bit reluctant since I really wasn't a party person and I didn't know anyone in the fraternity. But I figured it was just once, and it might be a nice alternative to spending yet another night at home alone or reading at the library. Usually, I didn't mind being by myself, but lately I had started to feel more lonely than alone. So I had decided to accept his offer and tonight at eight we were supposed to meet at his frat house.

_And when I don't show up, he'll be worried and soon the police will start searching for me__! Maybe Mike will turn out to be the key to my escape!_

"You're thinking about _him_ right now, aren't you?"  
>Edward's strained voice made me focus again and my heart froze when I saw what I had been trying so hard to avoid. Angry Edward.<p>

"Who?" I asked, as innocently as I could.

"Don't do that," he snapped. "You know who I mean. Mike. Mike Newton. Your date for tonight. Do you love him?"  
>"What? No!" I protested and took a few steps back. "Edward, honestly, I hardly even know him!"<p>

_Wait a second._

"How do _you_ know Mike?" I asked.

"How do you think?" Edward asked, sounding annoyed. "I saw him talking to you, of course."

"So…what? You started stalking him too?" I asked, feeling defiant.

"It's lucky for you that I did!" Edward spat. "How the fuck could you ever say yes to a guy like that? He's a creep, Bella."

"You're one to talk!" I snapped. "At least Mike can take me out on a real date!"

"Yeah, he'd show you a really good time," Edward shot back, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "That fucking asshole!"

I lost it. How dared Edward tell me who I could go out with? While Mike probably wouldn't have turned out to be the man of my dreams, he had chosen me as his date when he could have his pick of the beautiful and popular girls on campus. I had felt extremely flattered that he would go out with me and Edward had no right to shit all over that.

"You're just jealous!" I yelled. "You're jealous because he had the guts to ask me out like normal people do, and you're too messed up to ever be normal!"

"Shut up!"

"Why? Can't handle the truth?" I taunted. "You live out here in this big house all alone like a freak, and the only way you can get a girl to spend time with you is to kidnap her! You're sick!"

"Not as sick as that fucking asshole you agreed to go out with!" Edward yelled. "Do you even know what goes on at those parties?"

"Drinking, dancing, having a good time with your friends," I spat. "Things you would know nothing about!"

I whirled around and stomped into the hall and up the stairs.

"Where are you going?" Edward demanded as he followed.

"Away from you!" I screamed over my shoulder. "And you can forget about your pseudo date tonight! I only go out with sane people!"

"Bella, I'm sorry," I heard him say as he followed me up the staircase. "I didn't mean to yell at you. You don't understand but I'll-"

Out of nowhere a shrill ringing disrupted Edward.

_The doorbell!_

"HEL-"

My cry was immediately muffled by Edward's large hand as he grabbed a hold of me and covered my mouth. I fought wildly against him as he dragged me up the stairs and even managed to bite his hand which covered my mouth.

"Please, be quiet!" Edward pleaded in my ear. He sounded scared but I couldn't care less. I wanted out!

He dragged me into his bedroom, headed straight for his dresser and pulled out a roll of duct tape and a pair of handcuffs.

_Oh, God! NO!_

"No! No!" I cried behind his hand and struggled even harder as he half carried me across the hallway and into my bedroom where he finally released me to lock the door.

"Please, don't," I begged hoarsely and backed away from him.

Edward seemed frantic, his eyes darting all over the place in obvious panic when the door bell rang again. He took a step towards me and raised the hand in which he held the handcuffs and duct tape.

"No, please!" I cried. "I won't shout. Don't tie me up! Please, Edward, please!"

He hesitated and I could almost see the battle raging inside him due to the emotions on his face. He was terrified of being discovered but I could see that he didn't want to restrain me. Yet at the same time he looked determined. Determined to keep me hidden here at all costs. I couldn't let that happen. I couldn't let him tie me up and possibly gag me too. So much had been taken from me already and I couldn't lose my last ounce of freedom. I just couldn't! What if it was the police downstairs, getting ready to break down the door? If Edward thought that he had been caught, what would his reaction be? Would he hurt me? Or himself? Or both of us? I had to distract him somehow.

_But I can't__. I have no power._

_Yes, you do! He thinks he loves you. Use it to your advantage!_

And so I did. Swallowing all my fear I walked to Edward, stood up on my toes and pressed my lips against his. He froze completely and for a few seconds it was like kissing a statue. I placed my hands on his upper arms, feeling the hard straining muscles underneath his shirt and moved them slowly up to his tense shoulders before finally tangling my fingers in the soft hair on the nape of his neck. I pulled away slightly for a moment and then kissed him again. He surrendered with an exhale, closed his wide eyes and his lips started moving with mine, tentatively and trembling lightly. I felt his large hands find purchase on my waist as he pulled me a little closer until our fronts were touching whenever one of us inhaled.

The doorbell rang again, more insistently this time. Whoever was downstairs really wanted to draw attention to themselves. Edward stopped kissing me and I felt the grip on the items in his hand tighten.

"Please," I whispered against his lips and moved my hand down his arm until I felt the cold steel of the handcuffs against my fingertips. "You don't need those."

I kissed him with more fervor, parting my lips and brushing the tip of my tongue against his mouth. Edward moaned softly and didn't protest when my fingers pried his open and the items in his hand fell to the floor with a dull thud.

_Victory!_

Edward threw himself in the kiss; his arms encircled me and pulled me flush against him as his tongue made contact with mine. His now empty hand moved up my back and stroked my hair before he gently tilted my head to the side to further deepen the kiss. All the while, I listened intently for the sounds of a door breaking but there was nothing. For a moment I considered kneeing Edward in the groin to make a run for it but then I remembered that the door behind us was locked and Edward had the key deep in his front pocket. Even I was able to incapacitate him for a few moments, I wouldn't be able to wrestle the key from him and get the door unlocked before he was able to grab me again.

"I've wanted this for so long," Edward whispered and kissed me again. "You're so beautiful, so sweet."

His hold on me tightened and I couldn't help but gasp when I felt how hard he was, pressed up against my stomach.

"It's…It's because I want you so much," Edward stuttered. "But I won't, I won't make you, I swear."  
>He kissed me again and again, stroking my back and hair, making me feel lightheaded in the process. I didn't want to like it, but in a way I did. His lips were soft, his hands gentle and it felt completely different than kissing the few boys I had gone on dates with in the past. My body grew warm under Edward's hands and my heart pounded wildly in my chest.<p>

"Just tell me to stop and I will, okay?" Edward whispered before he moved his mouth to my neck while his hand on my back pressed me more firmly against him.

His body felt foreign against mine and yet it wasn't as uncomfortable as it should have been, being that close to him. The past few days we had been in the same room almost all the time and I was used to his proximity by now. My breath suddenly hitched in my throat when I felt Edward's lips grazing the shell of my ear and he nipped gently at my earlobe.

"You like that?" he whispered.

I wouldn't answer. I _couldn't_. That wasn't the reason I was doing this. I was trying to stay safe and get the hell out of here in one piece.

"Does it feel good?" Edward persisted and kissed his way down my neck to my shoulder. "Please, baby, tell me what you like and I'll do it."

_Baby?_

Thankfully, I didn't get a chance to respond before Edward's mouth covered mine in a searing kiss that left me weak in my knees. When his tongue caressed mine I accidentally moaned a little which made him groan before his hands slipped down and grabbed my butt.

Gasping, I pulled my mouth from his and stared up into his face. His eyes looked almost like he was sleepy, he was breathing heavily and his lips were a little puffy from all that kissing. The sound of a car starting distracted me and I listened with a heavy heart as the sound grew fainter by the second. It hadn't been the police, after all, and whoever had been by the door was leaving. Realizing his mistake, Edward slowly moved his hands upward to my waist again and leaned in to kiss me again.

"No," I whispered and backed out of his embrace.

"I'm sorry," he said immediately. "I shouldn't have. Just kissing, I swear."

"No!" I shook my head forcefully and turned my back to him.

"Why not?" he asked quietly. "I thought you liked it. I mean, it…it seemed like you did."

"I didn't," I insisted, even though I knew it was a lie. "I only did it because I was scared that you were going to handcuff me."

"Oh," Edward said, even more quietly.

He sounded so defeated. And although I had no idea why, I felt like a bitch for lying and hurting his feelings. I heard him moving around me and then his hand was underneath my chin, gently nudging it up until I looked at his face.

"Tell me you didn't like it," he whispered.

"I didn't like it," I said and crossed my arms over my chest.

A slow smile spread across his face.

"What?" I snapped.

"You're lying," he stated with complete confidence.

"No, I'm not!"

"Yes, love, you are," he said softly, still smiling. "You blush when you lie."

He reached out and touched my warm cheek with the backs of his fingers.

"Do you have _any_ idea how creepy it is that you would know that?" I hissed.

"Sorry," Edward said, and at least had the decency to look contrite. "Is that really the only reason you kissed me?"

"Yes!" I barked at him. "I was scared out of my mind! You grabbed me and dragged me up here against my will, Edward! Do you even now how much you terrified me?"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Edward said.

"Sorry? That's all you have to say after you almost handcuffed and gagged me?" I cried, as tears blurred my vision. "You said you wouldn't hurt me!"

"I won't! I swear, Bella! I got so scared that someone was coming to take you away from me and I panicked! I am making so many mistakes and it kills me that I keep hurting you. I don't mean to do it, I swear! I only want to love you and take care of you!"

"Just leave me alone," I sobbed. "Why won't you just leave me alone? Why did you take me, Edward? Am I a bad person? What have I done to deserve this?"

"Nothing," Edward croaked. "You're so good and sweet and I couldn't help it; I fell in love the moment I saw you. I love you, Bella."  
>"No, you don't!" I yelled. "You don't know what it means to love someone or you wouldn't do this to me!"<p>

I started hitting him. And he let me. He just stood there while I beat on him with my small fists.

"I hate you! I hate you!" I wailed.

"I know," Edward said hoarsely. "I hate me, too."

_Oh, God!_

I collapsed against Edward's hard chest, exhausted and drained, and he wrapped his arms around me for support.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he croaked.

I felt his tears drip into my hair as he cried quietly above me. After a while I pulled myself out of his embrace and picked up the handcuffs and duct tape from the floor.

"If you care about me at all you'll throw these away right now," I said, wiping my eyes with my free hand. "And if you ever try to tie me up like that again, I will never speak a single word to you. Not ever, Edward. I won't even acknowledge you are in the room."

"Yes. Yes, of course," Edward nodded and took the items from my outstretched hand. "I'll get rid of them, I swear."

"Good," I said and turned my back to him. "Now get the hell out of my room."

"Please forgive me," he whispered.

"No, I don't want to see you right now," I said. "I need some space."

"Okay," Edward said, sounding defeated. "I'll…I'll go downstairs and start lunch and, um, if you want to talk then just come down, okay?"  
>I nodded stiffly and heard him unlock the door and then leave the room, but then there were no other sounds. I turned and saw that for the first time ever, Edward had left the door wide open, as a symbol of his invitation to join him downstairs. I, however, saw it as a sign of something else: That it was the end of Edward's standoffish behavior when it came to his past and personal life. I wanted answers and I was going to get them!<p>

**Any thoughts on what Bella should ask Edward?**

**I hope the kiss didn't freak you out too much. It was either that, or Edward handcuffing her to the bed. The lesser of two evils, maybe, but Bella did seem to like it. **

**EPOV is up next (at least that's the plan). I'm assuming you guys are all for that. :)**

**Take care until next time and maybe leave me a little review? Last chapter had 4000 hits and about 120 reviews. Maybe a few of you lurkers out there have something to say too? ;) I would love to hear what you think of KidnapperWard, that's for sure. **


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyers.

**Hey, everyone!**

**I want to thank so many of you for reviewing the last chapter. It was wonderful to hear from all of you. You have officially been de-lurked! :)**

**As always, a huge thank you to Melanie (Edward's Eternal) who has debuted as an author! I am so proud of her! You need to check out her story "Simply Coffee" here on FFN. It's sweet, heartbreaking and so well written. And it updates daily! Please check it out and leave her some love. I know you'll enjoy the story! **

**Now, on to the EPOV I promised you. Enjoy! **

EPOV

I walked down the stairs, away from Bella, and wiped the tears from my eyes. She had kicked me out of her room. She didn't want to be near me. She didn't want me.

_She hates me._

_Of course she hates you, what did you expect? You're a vile, disgusting monster who took her from her bed in the middle of the night. She will never, ever love you!_

She wouldn't and it was entirely my fault. I looked at the items in my hand with disgust. How could I have done that? How could I have even considered it for a second? I hadn't been thinking and because of that I had fucked up, again.

_That's all you ever do! _

I looked out of the window to make sure that we were alone again. That whoever had been at the door was really gone. She was. It had to be her, right? Who else would drive all the way out here and ring the doorbell so insistently? I didn't think that the Avon lady was that desperate to make a sale. No, it was definitely her and she was right on schedule too. She had done the same thing at this time last year, refusing to take no for an answer. I didn't know why she bothered when she hated me so much.

When they both did.

They were better off without me, anyway. I drew a deep breath and pushed them to the back of my mind. There. _All better._

Reaching the kitchen, I threw both the handcuffs and the duct tape out with no hesitation. I had promised Bella that I would and despite all I had done to her, I never wanted to lie to her. And I hadn't. I had told her the truth when she asked me if I had ever done something like this before. And I hadn't been planning it either. I had acted in a state of panic and I hadn't thought this through at all. The girl of my dreams was in my house and I was doing a terrible job of earning her trust. I worried that she was going to hate me forever. That she found me repulsive.

_But she kissed you. And she liked it._

_God! That kiss! _

I leaned on the kitchen counter and buried my face in my hands as I recalled how it had felt having her in my arms. She had been warm and soft underneath my hands and my lips, and when she moaned I had just about lost it. But I shouldn't have moved my hands from her waist. She didn't like that and she didn't want to kiss me anymore after that.

_She's scared of me. Of what I'll do._

And I couldn't blame her. What I had done that night when she tried to run away…It was horrible. So horrible. I knew that. I had terrified her and groped her and made her cry. It seemed like all I was doing was making her cry. And all I ever wanted to do was to make her happy, to keep her safe and take care of her. And she needed taking care of, even if she denied it. I watched her from afar and at first she was just beautiful and sweet, but the more I learned about her, the more I could see the sadness underneath it all. She was lonely, just like me. She went to school, she went to work where she hardly talked to anyone except the customers and then she went home alone. Always alone. Just like me.

I didn't know why she isolated herself the way she did, but I suspected that she simply didn't have time for a real social life. She was always studying and working so hard. She always looked tired and it hurt me to see someone as lovely as her, struggle so hard to make ends meet. The few times I had dared to follow her into a supermarket I saw how she carefully selected the cheapest items, and once she even had to put a few things back because she didn't have enough money to pay for it at the register. I had felt so bad for her, seeing those slumped shoulders and how her whole face had turned crimson with embarrassment when she realized that she didn't have enough money. If I had been someone different, someone brave, I would have walked up to her and offered to pay for the groceries that she couldn't afford. But I didn't. Instead, I followed her home at a distance and watched as she wiped her eyes and lowered her head so that no one would see her sadness. Sadness, because it was the end of the month and she couldn't afford a jar of jelly to go with her peanut butter sandwiches.

_She deserves so much more! She deserves a better life!_

But that didn't give me the right to yank her out of the one she was living and lock her up here. I knew that. I also knew that the happiness I felt by having her here was wrong. But I couldn't help it. I _did_ feel happy. I felt alive again. Whenever she looked at me or said my name, it made my heart pound wildly and I knew that I was alive.

And in love. So in love.

She didn't believe that, but I was. She didn't think I knew what it was like to love someone because I had taken her, but I did. I knew, and it made me feel horrible that I was keeping her here against her will. If only I could take her out on a real date, outside this house. If only she would stay with me because she wanted to. If only she would love me. If only…

I sighed and started preparing lunch, hoping that Bella would come downstairs and keep me company. She didn't. She stayed away and while I wanted nothing more than to run upstairs and check on her, I knew that I needed to give her space. She would come down when she felt like it. I couldn't offer her much freedom but I _could_ give her that, at least.

After I had finished making lunch and setting the table I went into the living room to wait. Maybe she wouldn't come down at all? Feeling defeated, I started messing around with my guitar. I wondered if Bella could sing. I bet she could. She had the most beautiful voice and the most beautiful, infectious laugh; that was what drew me to her.

I remembered it vividly. It was a night like any other and I was roaming the halls of the university, looking for an excuse not to go home to my dark empty house. I attended school in an official capacity but I hardly ever attended classes. Being around that many people was…difficult. I didn't like it. I didn't like it when someone noticed me and the few times I had gone to a class I had hid in the back with my head down. I only went to avoid my house where I felt even more alone.

Some nights I would read at the libraries around campus and it was on such a night that I heard the most beautiful sound I had ever encountered. A laughter. So light and happy. I felt drawn to it. I wanted to know the source of that wonderful sound and crept silently in between the stacks to back of the library. It was a girl. A small dark-haired girl, reading a book. A funny book, apparently, because she laughed again and it made my heart race. She was just so…_beautiful_. Effortlessly so. She didn't look like a lot of the girls I saw around campus who wore tight fitting clothes and heavy makeup to attract attention to themselves. This girl wasn't like that at all. Her hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail but I could see that it was the most beautiful brown shade and it had a healthy shine to it. She didn't seem to wear any make up and her skin had a lovely almost translucent quality to it. Her eyes were big and expressive as they twinkled with amusement over something in the book and she let out a small giggle. Her lips her full and pink, natural. She was stunning. I had never looked at a girl before and just wanted to…everything, really.

I wanted to know her name, what she was reading, if she would want to get some coffee and talk. Maybe go out to dinner on the weekend if she wasn't too busy. A goodnight kiss and a promise of another date. Pipe dreams. That would never happen and I shrunk back into the shadows to avoid detection. Suddenly, she shut her book, stuffed it in her messenger bag and started putting on her jacket.

No! She couldn't leave. Not yet. I hadn't even had a chance to…nothing. Nothing was going to happen anyway. A girl like her would never go for a guy like me. The realization made me feel like a complete idiot for entertaining the idea for even a moment. I was alone. Always alone and it was entirely my fault.

I hid in the stacks when the girl left the library and then followed her. Mostly, because I was worried. The campus was dark with little security and I wanted to make certain that she made it to her car safely. I frowned when she passed the few parked cars and started walking briskly. The night was cold and I watched as she wrapped her arms around herself to stay warm. How could she walk out here all alone? Didn't she know how dangerous something like that could be? Why didn't she have a car or at least wait for the bus?

I followed her all the way home that night, at a safe distance, and breathed a sigh of relief when she finally walked into an old rundown apartment building in the poor part of town. It made me sad to think that she lived there but at least she was safely inside. I stayed hidden until the lights came on in her apartment and then crept over to the mailboxes on the side of the building. Bella Swan, the sign read. It was beautiful, just like she was. That was the night I fell in love. The night my whole life changed and I allowed myself to dream again. Dreams of not being alone and having someone. Someone sweet and beautiful.

_And now I do. Except for the fact that she loathes me and hates being near me._

I sighed sadly and strummed on my guitar. Music was an escape but at the same time it often made me feel even worse because all I ended up playing were melancholy songs. Songs about loss and pain and heartache. Since I saw Bella for the first time I had added songs about longing and unfulfilled love to my repertoire. I really was a pathetic loser.

"Whenever I'm alone with you  
>You make me feel like I am home again<br>Whenever I'm alone with you  
>You make me feel like I am whole again<br>Whenever I'm alone with you  
>You make me feel like I am young again<br>Whenever I'm alone with you  
>You make me feel like I am fun again<br>However far away I will always love you  
>However long I stay I will always love you<br>Whatever words I say I will always love you  
>I will always love you."<p>

Yep. Fucking pathetic. I started playing the second verse when I heard a throat being cleared across the room and jumped in my seat. I was so used to being alone here that Bella's presence startled me.

"S-sorry," I stuttered and put down the guitar.

"I didn't know you could play," she said softly.

"It's nothing," I shrugged and stood up. "I was just messing around."

"You don't play a lot?"

"Not really. It's not really fun when there's no one to play for."

She narrowed her eyes a little.

"And why is that?"  
>"Um, why it's not fun?" I asked.<p>

"No," she said, impatiently. "Why don't you have anyone to play for?"

"I just…don't," I deflected. "Hey, are you hungry? I made lunch."

"I know what you're doing," she said and crossed her arms. "You think I haven't noticed that you don't tell me anything about yourself? Why is that?"  
>"I…I don't like to talk about myself. I'd rather know more about you," I told her, honestly.<p>

"You know plenty!" she accused. "I don't know shit about you and it's not fair!"

I nodded because she was right, of course. I had been keeping things from her but it wasn't because I was wanted to lie to her. There were things about me that I didn't want her to know.

"Can we maybe sit down and eat while we talk?" I suggested carefully.

"Yeah, okay," she agreed after a short pause. "But you're not getting out of giving me answers, Edward."

I had no idea where her bravery came from, but I was thrilled to see that she wasn't scared of me. I never wanted her to fear me.

"No, I know," I nodded and led her into the kitchen where we sat down at the table.

We both helped ourselves to some food, but neither of us ate anything. I was scared. I wasn't any good at talking to people and I worried about what sort of questions she might have. She cleared her throat and I just about jumped out of my chair.

"How old are you?" she asked.

I relaxed marginally. That was an easy one, at least.

"Twenty-three," I replied and played with my glass.

"And what's your last name?"

"Cullen."

I glanced up at her and she was frowning a little.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Just like that," she said. "You'd just tell me your last name like it's no big deal?"

"Sure, why not?" I asked. "I know yours; it's only fair that you know mine."

She shook her head, still frowning.

"You're so convinced that you're never going to get caught, aren't you?" she asked and pulled her chair further away from mine.

I shrugged. It didn't really matter. If I lost Bella then they might as well catch me and throw my ass in jail. It's not like I would have a life anyway. Not without her. She huffed angrily when I didn't answer and dug into her lunch. For a few minutes there was just the sound of her chewing. Me, I couldn't even contemplate eating anything. I wasn't an idiot and I knew that the hard questions were bound to come soon.

"Why did you take me?" Bella blurted out suddenly and dropped her fork on her plate. "You said you'd been watching me for months and that you didn't plan any of this. But here I am. What changed?"  
>"I, uh, I didn't want you to go on that date," I said.<p>

It was the truth.

"That's it?" she asked, sounding upset. "That's the reason for all of this? Because you were jealous?"

"No, I…No," I mumbled. "I wasn't jealous, I was scared for you."

"Scared of what, exactly?" she asked.

"I don't like him… that ass, Mike," I deflected. "He's not a good guy. He…he uses girls."

"Oh, please!" Bella exclaimed. "You think I'm really that naïve? That I'd fall for a guy like that? Well, I wouldn't! And even if I did that doesn't give you the right to do what you've done because you have some sort of delusion and think you love me!"

"I do love you," I protested. "I-I was trying to protect you."

"From what?" she demanded. "Your story makes no sense, Edward!"

I didn't say anything.

"You're not telling me the truth," she accused. "I want to know why you did it! Why you drugged me and dragged me out of my safe warm bed to come and get locked up in this house with you? – And don't you dare say it's because you love me!"

I didn't know what to do. The truth would hurt her feelings and it would scare her.

"Why, Edward? Tell me the truth; you owe me at least that!" Bella yelled and stood up from the table.

"They were going to rape you!"

_Oh, fuck. I said it._

Bella's mouth fell open and she took a step back, like _I_ was the one who was planning to hurt her tonight.

"You're lying," she said.

"No," I shook my head. "No, I'm not. I wish I was, but…no. I heard everything."

"They…who?" she asked, narrowing her eyes at me.

"That guy Mike and his friend, I don't know his name, sorry."

"And they told you what, exactly?"

"Nothing, I eavesdropped."

She didn't believe me. I could tell. Truthfully, I didn't expect her to. But it _was_ the truth.

It had happened just last week. I was down the hall from Bella's classroom, waiting for her to come out so that I could follow her to her next class. Sometimes she went to the bathroom on the way. Sometimes she would get a cup of coffee from one of the vendors she passed. But that day she was not alone when she came out. She was talking to a blond, athletic looking guy and I froze completely.

_Who the hell is _that_?_

I saw him smiling as she nodded her head and gave him a tentative smile back. She rummaged through her backpack, pulled out a piece of paper and pen and wrote something down.

_That had better be her goddamn grocery list! _

She handed him the paper which he folded and put it in his pocket. Then they exchanged a few more words and went in opposite directions. I was torn. Should I follow Bella to her class or follow Assface, as I had affectionately named him, and find out who the hell he was. This new development worried me. I had never before seen Bella interacting with a guy who wasn't a customer where she worked and needless to say, I didn't like it one bit_. _

Especially not when she was talking to this particular guy.

He was too cocky, too confident. He looked like the sort of guy who had chatted up sweet, shy co-eds a million times in the past and Bella was just the next in line. Something about him made my spider-sense tingle and I knew I had to figure out who he was, and most importantly, what he wanted with Bella.

And so, I followed him across the campus to a café where he met up with another jock looking guy. Thankfully, the place was almost empty and I managed to slip into a booth undetected, while remaining within earshot. They talked for a while and it didn't take me long to determine that these two were not the sharpest knives in the drawer.

"So, who are you taking to the party next Friday?" his friend wanted to know.

"That Swan chick," Assface replied. "You know, the shy little brunette from my lit class."

"The one who's sort of hot in that 'girl next door' kind of way?"

"That's the one," he chuckled. "All sweet and innocent. Fuck, I can't wait to see what she's got going on under those baggy clothes."

"What's the game plan then?" his friend asked. "Get her nice and juiced? 'Cause you know how girls like that tend to save themselves for marriage."

"Yeah, they all do. What can I say? I like 'em tight and fresh," he laughed. "Gonna pound that virgin pussy so hard. Fuck, I can't wait!"

_You will not touch her! _

I felt all my muscles tighten and I clenched my jaw. They were talking about _my_ Bella. I grabbed on to the table tightly to contain my rage. I calmed slightly when I remembered that Bella wasn't that type and she would _never_ sleep with someone like him, let alone on the first date.

"Shit, Mike, you have to let me in on that action," his friend chuckled. "Maybe we can double team her? I bet that mouth is just as sweet!"

"There's a plan," Mike said. "But I think we're gonna need more than booze for that. She looks kind of prudish…I bet if I throw half a roofie in the mix we'd be able to fuck her in front of the whole party. She'll be so out of it that she'll let us do whatever. Damn, wouldn't that be awesome?"

"Fuck, yeah," his friend growled. "She won't tell, will she?"

"Nah, she'll be too fucked up to remember," Mike said dismissively. "Besides, who's going to believe a nobody like her? You and I run this school and everyone knows it. They'll back up our story and say that she was begging for it. Hell, I bet she might like it. She'll probably come crawling back begging for more cock."

They laughed loudly and the smack I heard indicated that they even high-fived each other. The matter was settled and they started talking about other things, like them planning to drug and rape an innocent girl was business as usual. I sat crouching down in my booth vibrating with anger and trembling with nausea at the same time. I imagined my beautiful Bella weakly trying to push away the men on top of her while the rest of the party looked on and cheered. I imagined how she would try to scream only to have her mouth covered. I imagined how no one would come to her rescue, either because they didn't care or because they didn't realize what they were witnessing: The destruction of Bella Swan, my sweet love.

I felt the bile rise in my throat and I had to get out of there. I bolted up from the booth and ran into the bathroom where I proceeded to throw up violently. I sat next to the toilet, shaking and dry heaving as their words kept echoing in my head. In less than a week, everything that was pure and innocent would be stolen from Bella. She would never be the same after that. I felt my world shift on its axis at that moment. I couldn't protect her from that. I couldn't keep her safe! But I had to. I was suddenly desperate to see her and ran out of the café over to her classroom.

I paced outside the door until class ended, and I almost forgot to hide myself before people started filing out. I held my breath. Bella walked out, fumbling with her book bag. I breathed out.

_She's okay! _ _She's safe!_

But for how long? It was no longer enough to merely watch over Bella from afar and the thought that things were about to take such a drastic turn both thrilled and terrified me.

I ended up telling Bella everything. Absolutely every disgusting word out of their filthy mouths. When I was done, her eyes were wide and her complexion had turned ashen.

"He…he wouldn't," she whispered. "Y-you're lying. You're lying."

I shook my head, sadly. I wasn't lying.

"He wouldn't!" she said, firmly.

"Yes, he would," I said softly. "They both would. And…and I'm sure they've done this before. They sounded so…casual about the whole thing. Like it was no big deal."

"No big deal," Bella croaked as her eyes welled with tears. "But they were going to…"

She looked down herself and folded her arms across her chest, as if to cover herself up even though she was fully dressed. Her hands started to shake.

"You're safe," I cooed soothingly and approached her. "They can't get you. I won't let anything happen to you, Bella, I swear."

"That's…that's why you…"

I nodded.

"B-but why didn't you just tell me?" she asked, her voice rough with tears.

"You wouldn't have believed me."

"Yes, I would!" she suddenly yelled.

"Really? A complete stranger walks up to you, telling you that he has been following you around and has now learned that the guy you're going on a date with is going to hurt you. You wouldn't have called me a sick creep and sent me on my way, thinking that I was just jealous?"

"I-"

She didn't continue and she didn't have to. We both knew that she never would have believed me.

"But you could have done something else," she cried. "Written me a letter or…or confronted Mike or something!"

"I panicked! I was so scared, Bella! I couldn't let them hurt you, I just couldn't!"

I knew that I had taken the coward's way out when I made my decision last week. I had thought about doing what Bella said, about confronting Mike, but he was always flanked by his cronies and I knew my meager threats wouldn't matter to him. I was a nobody, just as he thought Bella was, and he seemed to have a lot of influential friends. Even if I managed to jump him and get a few punches in I doubted that it would have done any good. I wasn't used to fighting and while exercise had helped me tone up I didn't think it made me strong enough to take on several athletes.

And also…I was selfish. And terribly lonely. I _wanted_ her here with me. I wanted to keep her safe and happy, to make sure she ate properly and hopefully she would look upon me and see someone she could maybe love someday. Or maybe, just maybe, she would fall in love with one look, like I had. Now I knew that the latter didn't happen. There was no love at first sight. Only disgust and hatred. Only resentment and fear. I had been such a fool to think that she might have the same reaction to me as I did to her. To think that love would conquer all. I had been naïve. Love wasn't for someone like me because I didn't deserve it. Bella deserved it, though. She deserved to be worshipped and cherished. I could do that. She didn't have to love me back. It was enough to simply have her here with me, even if she didn't want me like I did her.

"And now they won't," she whispered. "This changes everything."  
>"What?"<p>

"They can't hurt me now," she said, looking hopeful. "I won't go near Mike or any of his friends, I promise."

Oh, no. I could see where this was headed my heart started racing.

"You can let me go now!" Bella said excitedly. "I can go home and you can-"

She paused abruptly when she saw the pained expression on my face.

"And I can stay here. Alone," I continued in a gravelly voice.

"Edward," she said, softly. "I'm sorry, but-"

"_Please_!" I begged and dropped to my knees in front of her. "Please, Bella. Stay with me."

"Edward." Her voice was filled with trepidation.

"Please," I whispered and looked up into her eyes. "Just give me a chance. I'll do anything. Anything! I can sleep in my own room if you prefer and you can walk all over the house and even go out in the yard if you want. I know that I've fucked everything up but I love you and I never meant to hurt you. Please, don't go!"

I couldn't help myself. I stood up on my knees and wrapped my arms around her middle while burying my face in her shirt.

"Please, please, please," I begged, even though the sound was muffled and she probably didn't understand.

I inhaled deeply and my eyes all but rolled back in my head. She smelled so good; like warmth and comfort and just _home. _I held her tighter.

"Edward, please, j-just calm down," she said, and I sighed when I felt her hands on my shoulders.

"Please don't leave me," I whispered. "Stay with me, love."

"Okay," she exhaled. "Just…just stay calm, alright?"  
>"Yes, yes," I breathed out. "Anything you say, Bella."<p>

For a while I merely sat there on my knees, clutching her tightly until the panic I felt was starting to wear off.

"I'm so sorry," I mumbled. "Sorry for all of this. I just had to save you. I had to."

"You did," she whispered and stroked my hair gently.

"I won't ever let anyone hurt you, I promise," I vowed.

"I know."

Her voice sounded garbled and I looked up. Tears in her eyes. She looked scared. Scared of me. I let go of her and she immediately took a step back, away from me.

"Bella, I won't…I won't…"

"You scare me," she blurted out. "When you get like this. I'm afraid that you'll…lose it."

"I won't!" I insisted.

"I want to believe you," she said. "And…and I am really grateful that you didn't let them…I would have gone to that party. I didn't know, and I feel so stupid now. I thought he liked me."

"Do you like him?" I asked with my heart in my throat.

"No!" she shook her head. "I mean, I thought he was nice, but no. I wouldn't ever have let him…Never!"

"They would have drugged you. They would have made you," I said, feeling angry again. "When he talked about you like that I wanted… I wanted to fucking kill him!"

I jumped to my feet and Bella took two more quick steps back.

"No, no," I said softly, holding my hands up to calm her. "Please don't be afraid, love. I won't _ever_ do anything to harm you, I swear to God."

She nodded but didn't make a move.

"Do you think that maybe…maybe you could be happy here with me?" I whispered.

She was quiet for a long time, which worried me.

"I don't know," she finally said.

"I'll give you anything you could possibly want," I said quickly. "And I'll talk more about myself, I promise. No more secrets, I swear. And I meant what I said about me sleeping in my own room. I can do that."

"Really?" she whispered.

"Yes. Yes, anything you say. And I'll buy stuff to make this place better, more comfortable for you. Pillows and candles, just like you said. I just want a chance to…"

_To win your heart._

"To show you that I'm really not…bad. I know I did everything so wrong and I know that I've scared you, but it ends now, Bella, I promise. I'll be a saint. I won't kiss you or touch you unless you give me permission. And we can do whatever you want. You call all the shots."

"Why would you even do all that for me?" she asked, frowning.

"I know you don't think I know what love is, but I do," I said. "And I love you so much, Bella. These last few days I've spent with you have been…some of best in my entire life."

"But we've just sat around watching movies and reading books," she protested.

"I know. I guess I'm what you would call 'low maintenance'," I said, and made quotation marks with my fingers.

I could have sworn that I saw just the hint of a smile playing on her lips. Her perfect pink, soft kissable lips…

_Stop that!_

"Well, I guess I'm high maintenance then," Bella said. "Because I really need to do something else."  
>"Okay, what do you want?" I asked.<p>

"I don't know," she scrunched up her a nose a little and looked around. "What do you suggest?"  
>"We can play chess?" I suggested, much too eagerly.<p>

But when you hadn't had anyone to play your favorite game with for years you tended to be excited about the prospect of playing with someone other than the computer.

"I, uh, I actually don't know how to play," she admitted.

"I can teach you," I smiled.

"Okay," she nodded. "Shouldn't we take care of that first, though?"  
>She motioned to the leftovers from lunch.<p>

"Later," I said, holding out my hand to her. "I'll just throw it out."

"That's wasteful," she protested.

"Oh, I guess I could wrap it up and put it in the refrigerator?" I asked, unsurely. "Um, save it for later?"  
>"You sound like you've never had leftovers before," she said.<p>

"I usually just throw away what I don't finish," I admitted.

She shook her head, disapprovingly.

"What are you, a millionaire?" she mumbled.

"Yes."

Her eyes snapped up to mine, wide with shock.

"I…I was kidding," she whispered.

"Oh. Um, good one," I said, feeling awkward.

"I think we need to talk about you some more, Edward."

_Fuck._

**Aha! So he did have a pretty good reason for taking Bella. He probably could have handled the situation a lot better but at least his intentions weren't malicious. That's gotta count for something, right? Right? Or are you still on team 'throw kidnapperward's ass in jail?' Or are you now on team 'castrate Mike in the most painful way imaginable'? I'm thinking wild dogs chewing off his junk. Any other ideas?**

**We learned that it was a woman at the door. Who could that be? Maybe his clingy ex-girlfriend Tanya looking for a booty call? (Eew. It's not. I would never do that to you guys. Or to Edward, for that matter.) Don't worry, you'll find out who it is eventually. She'll be back. ;)**

**So is Bella staying there of her own free will now? I guess we have to get inside her head next time to find out what she thinks about all of this. **

**Leave me a review if you feel like it and take care until next time. **


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

**Hey everyone, I know that it's been a while since the last update. I've been busy with holidays, my kids and school, but finally managed to get this long chapter written. :)**

**Thank you so much for all your reviews and PMs. It's wonderful to hear from my ol' faithful readers as well as new de-lurked ones. Everyone liked hearing Edward's side of things and there were some very creative suggestions on how Mike should be dealt with. That was awesome! **

**And, of course, a huge thank you to my lovely beta, Melanie, or Edward's Eternal as she is known as here and on Facebook. She has a new story out called Awaken. It's just two chapters in so you can easily catch up. Plus she updates several times a week! (Must be nice!) Check it out and leave her some love. :)**

**Now on with the show. Enjoy! **

BPOV

"So, you're rich?" I asked.

"I guess," Edward shrugged. "I never really think about money."

I snorted.

"That's because you have it."

"Yes, I suppose that's true," Edward nodded, looking apologetic.

I had no idea why I was choosing to focus on the subject of Edward's wealth when there were probably a million other things I should be thinking about; like the fact that Edward saved me from something so horrible that I couldn't even bring myself to use the actual words for it. It would have happened if Edward hadn't done something to stop it. I was so blinded by Mike's popularity and all-American good looks that I never would have seen it coming before it was too late. Thinking back now, knowing what I knew, I could recall several rumors and stories floating around about the wild parties at Mike's frat house. Stories about girls getting hammered and doing all sorts of things they regretted the next day. I had always shaken my head and thought about how irresponsible and stupid those girls were, drinking so heavily and acting like that. Now, I felt ashamed for thinking such thoughts. Those poor girls! That could have been me. That _would_have been me if it hadn't been for Edward.

I looked at him; standing there with his hands buried in his pockets and his hunched shoulders, looking so contrite, so sad, and so unsure of himself. He hardly resembled the epitome of a knight in shining armor. In fact, going off his actions alone before this major reveal, he seemed like the villain in this plot. But he _did_ save me. If he hadn't overheard that conversation…

"What were you doing at the university in the first place?" I asked.

Edward shifted his weight.

"Well, I was…I was looking out for you, of course."

"You mean, you were stalking me," I corrected.

"Yes," he nodded.

"Why?" I asked. "Why did you stalk me?"

"Because I like looking at you," Edward said.

_Pervert!_

"I-I mean, I…that came out wrong. It calms me, knowing that you're safe all the time. I just wanted to be a part of your world, even if you never knew it."

I shook my head.

"I don't understand that at all," I said. "Why didn't you just, I don't know, walk up and introduce yourself, ask me out?"

Edward's eyes widened.

"No. I could never have done that," he said so quietly that I had to strain my ears so not to miss his words.

"Why not?"

"You wouldn't ever have gone for a guy like me," he said, avoiding my eyes.

"Yeah, 'cause that rich and handsome combo is a real turn off," I remarked, sarcastically.

I didn't think it was possible for Edward's eyes to become wider, but they did. He reached his hand up and touched his face.

"You think I'm handsome?" he whispered, sounding breathless.

I narrowly resisted the urge to roll my eyes. No one could deny his good looks.

"You'd be a lot more attractive to me if you didn't scare me half to death most of the time," I said. "But, yes…I think you're handsome."

He studied my face for what seemed like a long time.

"You really mean it," he said, very softly. "Thank you. Thank you, love."

"Look, that's something else I wanted to talk to you about," I said, ignoring his thank you.

"What is?"

"Calling me 'love'," I said.

"You don't like it?"

"It's inappropriate," I argued. "We're…we're not in love, Edward. You do know that, right?"  
>"I'm not stupid," he whispered, looking away from my face. "I know you don't love me and you probably never will. I know I'm…a monster."<p>

"You're not a monster, Edward," I sighed, feeling tired. "But you have to realize…love can't blossom under these conditions."

"I'll change!" he said, immediately. "I'll be better, I promise. Just tell me what you need me to do and I'll do it!"

"That's not even…that's not the point," I said, flopping down on my chair again.

Edward obviously didn't get it. He thought I was staying here willingly now. His freak out when I talked about leaving had terrified me and I would have agreed to just about anything to calm him down. I wasn't scared of him right now because he was calm, but whenever something upset him I felt fear trickling up my spine and had the urge to run in the opposite direction. He was so volatile and I had no idea what would set him off. Well, that wasn't true. I did know one thing; the subject of my leaving this house. And I still wanted to leave. I was extremely grateful that Edward had saved me from going to that party, even if he had done it in a completely insane way, but that didn't change the fact that he was keeping me here against my will. How would he have reacted if I had simply walked to the door leading outside and asked him to unlock it? If I had ignored his begging me to stay and insisted that I wanted to go, now that the reason for my abduction was gone? Would I have been confined to my room again? Or worse yet, tied to the bed to make sure that I didn't leave? I couldn't risk that. Edward was starting to trust me and letting me out of my room. If I was ever going to escape I had to make sure that he kept on trusting me.

"Bella, please help me," Edward pleaded and knelt down in front of me. "I don't know what I'm doing here."

"What do you want me to say?"

"Just…tell me how I can make you happy," he said, hesitantly reaching for my hands which rested in my lap. "Give me a chance."

He held my much smaller hands in his and then bowed forward to place a kiss on each one. When he looked up his eyes were filled with emotion.

"Please talk to me," he said. "I want so much to make you happy and do all the right things, but I'm…I'm lost, love, I mean Bella, sorry!"

"You have to stop scaring me," I whispered. "No more yelling or dragging me up the stairs, and especially no restraints of any kind."

"I promise, I promise!" Edward nodded. "I won't, not ever again. I never meant to, honestly."

"And…and you have to give me space," I added. "You'll sleep in your own room like you said?"

He didn't like that. I could tell by the way his eyebrows drew together in a frown and his lips curved downward ever so slightly. After a few seconds he sighed and nodded again.

"If that's what you want. I'll…I'll stay away from you."

His whisper was barely audible and the look on his face was nothing short of devastating. It was obvious that he hadn't thoroughly thought what this meant when he agreed to it before. It seemed to have dawned on him now, though, and he looked crestfallen. Even though I shouldn't, I felt bad for him.

"Edward, listen," I began and gave his hands a small squeeze. "I'm not-"

_What? Rejecting him? Isn't that how he will perceive my refusal to share a bed with him?_

"You don't have to stay away from me," I finally said. "I like spending time with you when you're…"

_Not crazy._

"Like this," I finished.

"Really?" he asked.

"Yes," I nodded. "Really."

His smile was radiant.

"Does that mean that you're up for our date tonight?" he asked.

"I don't know," I answered honestly.

"Oh, why not?"

"I don't want you to get the wrong idea," I said. "I…I don't want to say yes if it will lead you on and hurt your feelings."

"I love you more than anything and you despise me," Edward said, raising himself up on his knees until we were at eye level. "I think the damage has been done."

"Edward, I don't-."

"Please don't lie," he said, reaching up his hand to touch my cheek. "I know what you must think of me. I don't ask for you to love me, Bella, because I know that it's impossible. I just want to spend a little time with you. I want to…not be alone anymore."

"Why are you all alone?" I whispered. "Where's your family? Your mom and dad?"

It was instantaneous; Edward's eyes grew wide, his breathing stuttered and his body froze. His hand on my cheek started trembling.

"Edward?"

"No," he said, his voice rough. "Please, no."

He lowered his hand, his body slumped down and he clutched his midsection like he was in acute pain. He started hyperventilating. It was terrifying to watch.

"Edward!"

"I…can't…breathe…" he wheezed, curling further into himself.

_Oh, fuck! What do I do?_

"Calm down," I said, feeling foolish.

There was no calming Edward right now. His body shook and his wheezing got even worse with every passing moment. I was afraid that he was going to pass out but I was also scared of getting near him.

"Oh, God!" he gasped. "Bella, help!"

I stopped rationalizing. Before I knew it I was perched on the floor in front of Edward, pulling his rigid form to me. I wrapped my arms around his tense shoulders and lowered his head to rest in the crook of my neck.

"It's okay, it's okay," I said, using the calmest, softest voice I could conjure up. "You're okay, I'm right here."  
>"Bella."<p>

He said my name in a broken whisper as his arms uncurled and came around my middle, drawing me closer until I was straddling his bent legs.

"I'm here," I said again and slowly combed my fingers through his hair.

After a minute or two, Edward's breathing started to sound less strained and slowed considerably. He was still holding me tightly against him, and even though our position on the floor was intimate, I didn't feel any fear which was strange because I had never been so close to a boy before.

_No, not a boy. A man._

Edward was definitely a man. The hard definition of his muscles, the square angle of his jaw and the stubble on his cheeks all screamed adult male even though his actions often reminded me of an adolescent. He gently pulled me even closer until our fronts were touching completely and nuzzled my neck. The feel of his stubble made my skin break into goose bumps but it wasn't unpleasant. I dared to close my eyes for a minute when Edward's fingertips trailed up and down my back, caressing me. With my mom having passed away and my dad not being big on showing affection it had been years since anyone had really touched me. Well, Edward had held me before but it was different now because I wasn't crying or upset. Now I was just enjoying the embrace even though I probably shouldn't. I couldn't help but like it. Edward was warm, his hands were gentle and he smelled really nice. But it was more than that and deep down I knew it. He needed me like no one ever had before and it felt good. I felt important, like I mattered, because to him I really was important. And although I knew that it was wrong of me to feel that way it didn't change the fact that I liked it.

Edward shifted a little beneath me and blew out a deep breath which fanned out across my neck.

"Are you alright?" I asked.

He nodded against me.

"Thank you," he whispered. "I didn't mean to. I hope I didn't scare you."

"You didn't," I replied honestly. "What…what happened?"

"I can't talk about that. Please, Bella, I'll tell you anything you want to know but I just…I just can't."

"Okay," I agreed easily.

I wasn't at all interested in seeing him like that ever again. Maybe if I had been a malicious person I would have found happiness in the fact that Edward was troubled but that wasn't me. Just like Edward didn't gloat when I hurt my foot trying to escape. He cared for me then and I did the same for him now.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled and rubbed his cheek against my collarbone. "I promised you no more secrets."

"Don't be," I said. "I don't want you to have another…anxiety attack?"  
>"Yeah," he said quietly.<p>

He didn't elaborate and I didn't expect him to. I just kept on stroking his hair until he was completely relaxed.

"This is so nice," he murmured. "Just being with you. Thank you, lo- I mean, Bella."

He lifted his head slowly, brushing his cheek against mine in the process. Instead of pulling his face away from mine he lingered. I could feel his lips against my jaw and a mere tilt of my head would bring mine in contact with his. Part of me wanted to kiss him and part of me didn't. It was so wrong to want this. Edward was still keeping me here against my will and I knew that I should fight against him tooth and nail to get out of here. I should scream and kick and bite and yet, here I was, draped around him like a lover would. The animosity I had felt for him when I first came here had faded into confusion by witnessing his usual gentle nature and then coming face to face with his dark desperation when he thought we had been discovered had terrified me. Learning that he had saved me from rape had further dispelled my feelings of hatred towards him and seeing him now, so tortured about something concerning his family, made me feel for him. Not just pity, but a longing to help him, to understand him better. I still wanted to escape. I knew I had to. I couldn't let the rest of the world think that I was dead. I could never be happy living in a golden cage. But leaving Edward to his loneliness and solitude would be difficult.

"I feel so safe with you," he murmured. "Like…like nothing bad can happen when I'm with you, when you touch me. Like maybe your goodness will protect me."

"Nothing bad is going to happen," I said.

"You won't leave, will you?" he asked, sounding anxious.

"No."  
>The lie tasted bitter in my mouth. He was so sincere in his worry and I was lying through my teeth. It made me feel like a horrible person.<p>

"You'll stay?"

"Yes," I whispered, blinking back the tears in my eyes.

"You'll give me a chance?"

I nodded and closed my eyes to hide my deception in case he should look up at me.

"Oh, Bella!" he gasped and held me even tighter. "Thank you. Thank you."

_I'm going to hell for this._

_No, you're protecting yourself from the psycho who is keeping you locked up in his house!_

Except he didn't feel like a psycho to me. Edward was definitely strange and socially awkward but I didn't think he was actually dangerous. And I didn't care that he wasn't confident and cocky. In fact, I preferred it. He was quiet, serious, well-read and handsome. If I had met him in a conventional setting I would have liked him. More than liked him.

"Bella?" Edward whispered, lifting his head a little and brushing his lips against mine as he spoke.

I could feel my heart galloping as well as a rush of unexpected butterflies in my stomach our when mouths made contact.

"Y-yes?" I stuttered.

I never did find out what Edward was going to ask me because a moment later he pressed his lips against mine. I held perfectly still on the outside but on the inside my heart sputtered and went even further into overdrive. What should I do? If I pulled away would he be angry? No, I didn't think so. He would be hurt and sad but he wouldn't be angry. His lips molded themselves easily against mine as he placed the softest of kisses on my closed mouth before parting his lips and sweeping his tongue out, asking silently for access. And then it happened. I granted it and parted my lips. Edward's breath was already labored and he moaned deep in his throat when his tongue slowly caressed mine. The sound and feel of him caused a rush of excitement to turn and twist my insides and it had absolutely nothing to do with fear. I liked it. I liked kissing Edward.

_What's happening to me?_

Was I so desperate for human contact that I would settle for the affection I received from my kidnapper? No, that couldn't be it. I wouldn't do this with just anybody. Even when I believed that Mike was a good guy I wouldn't have made out with him. That wasn't me. I wasn't like that. Except now I was, because I was kissing Edward and I liked it. I liked the softness of his lips, his gentle touch, the feel of his strong muscles beneath my hands, his subtle cologne and the way he moaned. It was all very…sexy.

"You feel so good," Edward whispered after releasing my lips and turning his attention to my neck. "Oh, God. Bella."

My face, as well as the rest of me, heated up when he groaned against my skin and I felt him grow hard underneath me. His mouth was on mine again, his tongue in my mouth. His hands moved down to my hips, pressing me down on him. He was so hard. My experience was limited but I knew what it meant: Edward wanted to have sex. With me.

I froze. I wasn't ready for that. Yes, I liked kissing him but that was it. I wasn't in love with him and I couldn't ever allow myself to forget that the man in my arms was my abductor, no matter how likeable he was. Or how wonderful it felt kissing him. I had to stop now before Edward got the wrong idea about where this was headed. But I didn't have to. Edward did it for me. Our connection was broken when he abruptly jerked his head back, sat up straight and easily lifted me off his lap and onto the floor.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have," he said quickly and scrambled to his feet.

His cheeks were flushed and he turned his face away from me to hide his embarrassment all the while crouching slightly in an attempt to also hide his erection.

"I didn't mean to take advantage of the situation. Um, thank you for, uh, calming me down."

He shifted uneasily from foot to foot.

"So, yeah, I'll be back soon, okay? Just…make yourself at home."

He fled the kitchen before I could respond, muttering to himself under his breath and I heard him stomping up the stairs, berating himself with words like 'idiot' and 'stupid'. I clambered off the floor and tried to get my racing heart under control.

_What were you thinking? You kissed him!_

I did. And this time it wasn't to protect myself from his anger or his fear of losing me. Why had I done that? What happened to not leading him on? This was so messed up. I reached up and touched my flushed cheeks and then my lips which unbelievably felt a little tingly. Then I shook my head at my own stupidity. Edward definitely shouldn't scold himself for kissing me because this time I clearly led him on. I was the one who was an idiot. I knew he thought he loved me, I definitely knew that he wanted me and yet I had still let him kiss me.

_So stupid!_

I decided to stop hiding in the kitchen and instead start acting like an adult and go upstairs to talk to Edward. I didn't know what he was thinking but knowing him he was probably giving himself a hard time about kissing me. And this time he shouldn't. I walked up the stairs and saw the door to Edward's room, ajar.

"Edward?" I called softly, pushing the door open. "Oh, I'm sorry!"

He was kneeling by the bed, hands folded on the bedspread. I felt like such an intruder and started to back away when he spoke.

"Do you pray, Bella?" he asked.

"No," I shook my head slowly.

"You don't believe?"

"I don't really know," I said, feeling awkward.

"I don't know either," Edward sighed. "I don't think He's listening to me."

"What do you pray for?" I asked.

This was so weird. We were actually having a religious discussion and I couldn't remember ever having attended church.

"Forgiveness," Edward whispered. "Peace. Love. Happiness. All the major ones, I guess. Whatever, it's stupid anyway."

He sounded bitter.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

This couldn't just be about the fact that he got a hard on while making out with me.

"Why did you let me kiss you?" he asked, turning his face to look at me. "Am I that pitiful?"

"No."

"You said you'd give me a chance but that's not really true, is it?" he asked, sounding resigned.

I took a step back.

"Don't be scared," he whispered. "I'm not mad. It was too good to be true anyway. You're a good person and you feel pity for me. That's all."

"How do you know?" I asked. "I don't feel like a very good person after what just happened downstairs. I didn't mean to lead you on."

"You're good," he said, a soft smile playing on his lips. "I've seen you. The way you are with people; you always give the homeless money even though you have so little for yourself, and you never cut in front of someone while waiting in line even if you can get away with it. You talk to salespeople and you smile at strangers when you pass them. You're kind, sweet, beautiful and selfless. And I love you more than anything in this world."

I couldn't help but gasp. Both from hearing his declaration and learning how much he knew. He had been watching me so closely!

"I'm sorry about what happened downstairs," he continued. "I…I want you so badly, Bella, and when you held me, I…for a few minutes I let myself think that it was okay. That it was okay to settle for your pity as long you kissed me and held me. It was selfish of me. I'm sorry."  
>"I liked kissing you."<p>

_Shit! Why did I say that?_

_Because it's the truth._

"You did?"

I nodded stiffly.

"But I don't know what it means," I whispered. "I'm…confused."  
>"You're very honest," he commented, a slow smile spreading across his face. "Thank you."<br>"Um, no problem," I said, feeling uneasy.

Edward rose from the floor in a fluid, graceful motion and I forced myself to stand my ground and not take a step back like I always did when confronted with the fact that he was so broad and tall compared to me. He walked over to me and hesitantly reached out to touch the side of my face.

"I'm confused too," he confessed, his eyes large and sincere. "The way I feel about you…it's scary at times."

"Why?" I whispered.

"Because you can hurt me," he said softly, caressing my cheek.

"I don't want to," I said, honestly.

_But I may have to if I ever want to leave._

"Then don't," he implored. "Stay with me, Bella. Let me love you. Let me take care of you. I'll do anything humanly possible to make you happy. Just please don't leave me."

I didn't say anything. I didn't want to lie to him anymore and if I promised to never leave it would be a lie. I wasn't ready to surrender. There were people out there who were looking for me, who needed me, and I couldn't let them all believe that I was dead. And so, I said nothing. I merely stared up into Edward's eyes until he nodded, a look of defeat on his face.

"It's okay," he whispered and looked away from me. "Thank you for not lying."

He took me gently by the elbow and led me across the hall to my room.

"I have to go out now," he said. "And I need you to stay in here while I'm gone."

"Do you have to lock me in?" I whispered, stupidly.

"I don't want to," Edward said, echoing my words from before.

Now it was my turn to nod, resigned. This wasn't the time for fighting that issue. But for the first time I didn't want Edward to go. I had gotten used to his company and I didn't want to be alone in this room.

"Is there anything you need? Anything at all?"

I shook my head and sat down on the bed, feeling tired.

"No, just go," I said, dully.

"Bella…"

"I said; just go already!" I snapped and fell back on the bed with an angry huff.

Rather than leaving, Edward approached cautiously and like the petulant child I had apparently become, I turned my back on him when he sat down on the bed next to me.

"I don't want to go," he said again. "I miss you whenever we're not together."

I didn't reply. What was I supposed to say? You're my kidnapper but you're sort of nice and I'm lonely, so please stay with me?

"I wish I could take you with me when I go," he whispered.

His large warm hand brushed my hair away from my neck and started to gently massage my top shoulder.

"I wish that I could take you out on a real date," he continued, slowly rolling me onto my stomach to gain access to my other shoulder.

"I'd bring you flowers and I'd hold the car door open for you."

His thumbs pushed against my muscles, working languidly yet effectively to release my built up tension. I found myself almost instantaneously relaxing under his capable hands.

"I'd take you to the nicest restaurant I could find, order the best wine, hold your hand and ask about your day while we wait for our appetizers."

_That sounds nice._

"I'd encourage you to order the best off the menu but knowing you, you'd order one of the cheapest items like chicken because you don't like spending a lot and you already know that you'll like the chicken."

I felt a smile tugging at the corners of my mouth. That did sound like me.

"We'd share a dessert and I'd let you eat most of it because I would want you to enjoy yourself on our date. Just being with you would be enough for me," Edward sighed and deepened his massage.

I suppressed a groan as he worked out all the kinks in my neck and shoulders.

"Then I'd take you out to a movie; something you'd enjoy watching. I'd hold your hand the whole time and people would know that we were together. I'd be so proud to be with you."

He sounded so wistful, his voice filled with longing.

"Then I'd drive you home and walk you to your door. Maybe you'd even kiss me goodnight. Either way, it would be the best night ever because I spent it with you. I'd make sure you were safely inside before getting back in my car and then I'd send you a text immediately, telling you how much I look forward to seeing you again."

His fingers stopped moving.

"And then I'd drive home. Just like that. Because I'd know there would be another date. I wouldn't sit outside your apartment half the night and I wouldn't follow you around the next day. I wouldn't be some disgusting stalker who kidnapped you and you wouldn't…you wouldn't hate me. You'd like me. You'd want to be with me. I wouldn't have to make you stay here."

He started massaging again; long slow strokes up and down the length of my back.

"I wish I could give you that, Bella, because you deserve the best of everything. I wish I could give you the whole world."

"I don't want the whole world," I mumbled. "I just want more than this room, this house."

"I know," Edward said quietly. "I know, love."

I didn't bother correcting him this time.

"I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for doing this to you," he continued. "For scaring you and making you cry. I wasn't thinking when I took you, Bella. And I didn't do it to hurt you. I just had to save you."

"I know," I whispered.

I believed him. Edward hadn't been operating under malicious intent when he grabbed me. He had been scared and panicked. I knew that now. But it didn't change the fact that I still wanted my freedom.

"Where did you learn to do this?" I asked, trying for a lighter topic. "Giving massages, I mean."

"Took a class," he replied quietly.

His hands felt so good and I practically melted into the mattress. He was obviously great at this.

"Do you work as a massage therapist?" I mumbled.

"No, silly," he chuckled. "I took the class for you."

My head shot up.

"For me?" I questioned.

"You're always carrying your heavy book bag and lifting stuff at work. Plus you tense your shoulders like crazy when you sit at a computer. If anyone needs regular massages it's you."

I felt stunned. Edward had taken a massage class just because he thought I needed it. I wasn't sure if I should feel flattered or creeped out at that moment. And what was even more disturbing…

"Edward?" I asked hesitantly.

"Mmm?" he hummed while making large circles across my lower back.

"You said that you never planned on taking me," I reminded him. "Then why would you attend a class?"

He sighed.

"I didn't plan it, I swear, Bella."

"But then why?"

"Because…because I liked doing it. I liked pretending that you were my girlfriend. God, I'm such a loser."

He had stopped massaging me and now his hands were just resting on my lower back.

"I just did what I would have done if we were really together. I have a lot of free time on my hands and it felt nice walking into that class and saying that I had someone to learn for. It made me feel…normal, you know? I realize how pathetic that probably makes me sound but…but it's the truth and I never want to lie to you. I just tried to make myself perfect. Perfect for you and then maybe…if I ever did find the courage to talk to you…well, you know," he finally trailed off.

"I wish you _had_ found the courage," I whispered. "I would have liked you."

Edward made a choking sound and slowly removed his hands. My lower back felt cold without his touch.

"I guess we'll never know if…if maybe you could have…"

I could hear it in his voice; he was crying. I was afraid to roll over and look at him, to see his devastation. He had made such a mess of everything and I think he truly realized that now. Maybe…if Edward hadn't taken me. If he had simply introduced himself one day on campus. Could something have happened between us? Could we be in love right now? It hurt to think about because I had a pretty good idea of what the answer would have been.

Finally I couldn't take it anymore and rolled over onto my back. Edward wiped his eyes with the backs of his hands quickly and looked away, embarrassed by his tears. But he shouldn't be, because in that moment there were tears in my eyes, as well.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered. "I wish I could be normal. I wish I had done everything different."

"Me too."

We stared at each other for a long time. He really was very beautiful. Deeply flawed, yes, but beautiful just the same.

"Will you have dinner with me tonight?" Edward asked. "No expectations. No date. Just to talk and get to know each other better. Nothing fancy, I promise."

I couldn't think of a reason to say no. I still wanted Edward to trust me so that I would be allowed to roam around freely. Denying his request and spending the night alone in my room didn't sound appealing at all and there were things I wanted to ask him.

"Do you know how to roast a chicken?" I asked, remembering his comment from before.

He laughed. I couldn't remember him doing that before and it was enough to take my breath away. His whole face transformed for a moment. He looked years younger, happy and carefree.

"I happen to make a great roast chicken," he boasted with a grin.

I returned the smile and for the first time it wasn't fake. I wasn't put off by the thought of spending the evening in Edward's company, just talking, like he had said. It actually sounded…nice. Just like Edward was also…nice.

_More than nice._

_Shut up. _

"You're so beautiful when you smile," he said with genuine awe in his voice.

My heart skipped a beat and my cheeks flushed at his unexpected compliment. That was when I realized how much trouble I was in. I kind of liked Edward.

_More than kind of._

_Shut. Up. _

**Bella, Bella, Bella. Why do you fight against your feelings? Oh, yeah. Because he kidnapped you. **

**Can they ever move past that? Not a whole lot of answers this time, sorry about that. They're coming, I promise. So, they're not having a date per say but they're going to have dinner, at least. Am I the only one who is hoping that it will involve a goodnight kiss? I know that some of you haven't warmed up to Takenward but I'm glad that you keep reading, regardless. **

**Oh, and by the way. My story The Education of Professor Cullen is now complete, save for a future-take, so check that out if you'd like a fun and smutty love story without too much drama. :) **

**That's all for now. Take care until next time. **


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

**My real life is busy. You can read about it on my profile, but I do apologize for the long wait.**

**Sometimes, these things write themselves, and sometimes unexpected things happen while writing. This is one of those times. I'm sorry this is so short, but I figured it was better than nothing, after such a long wait. **

**Thank you, Melanie. My evil genius. ;) **

**Enjoy. **

BPOV

"Is it okay if I go now?" Edward asked. "I mean, are you feeling better?"

I nodded, sitting up on the bed.

"I'll be back as soon as I can," he promised.

"I know."

With one more glance and a quick smile, Edward left. I listened, not surprised when I heard the unmistakable sound of the key. It created a stark juxtaposition to the intimate moment we had shared mere seconds ago and served as a harsh reminder that, despite all of Edward's sweet words, I was still his prisoner here.

Sighing, I fell back on the bed, staring at the ceiling. What had happened to my life, now that I was no longer living it? Did everyone think I was dead? How long would it be until Charlie discovered that I had gone missing? We hardly talked anymore, but he was listed as my 'in case of an emergency' person, so the police had probably contacted him by now. Was he out there looking for me right now? I had only been here a week, but it seemed a lifetime, in some respects. It wasn't that I missed my old life, per se. I didn't miss my job, where most of my colleagues ignored me, and I didn't miss worrying about money all the time. I missed having opportunities, and working toward something. What did I have to look forward to in this life with Edward? I would get to know him better and spend more time with him, which was something I wanted, but that wasn't nearly enough, and I knew it. I would have to stay here, locked up, whenever he left to make his trips into the real world.

_I won't see another person, ever again. Only Edward. Always._

No one knew I was here. Only Edward. I was completely dependent upon him for everything. Even the most basic of necessities, like food and clothes, were completely in his control. I could only lie here and wait for his return. Like a pet.

_How long will I have to wait today?_

Edward had said a few hours, but what if it was longer than that? What if… what if something happened to him? I sat up on the bed, staring at the locked door, then the bars on the windows. What if he got into an accident? What if he died? What would happen to me?

_No one knows I'm here! _

If Edward for some reason wasn't able to return… I'd die. I'd starve to death. All alone.

_I'll die in this room, all alone!_

My breathing became fast and shallow, and the walls seemed to close in on me. Panic. This was panic. And terror. I had to get out of here! Stumbling off the bed, I ran to the door and starting yanking on the handle. I threw myself against it, hurting my shoulder. I was trapped.

Without giving it a second thought, I grabbed one of the chairs by the table and hurled it against the window with all the force I could manage. The sound of glass shattering only fuelled my determination. I threw the small table aside, grabbed the chair again and slammed it against the window, over and over again.

"HELP ME! PLEASE, SOMEONE HELP ME!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, gripping and shaking the steel bars that hadn't been damaged in the slightest. "HEEEEEEELP!"

I registered pain in my hands, but I didn't stop. I screamed until my voice was hoarse and the words that left my throat no longer made sense. At some point I crumbled to the floor, exhausted, sobbing and bleeding. I had cuts on my fingers and inside my palms. My feet were unharmed, only because I was wearing shoes. There was glass everywhere; on the floor, on the windowsill, on the overturned table. I had made quite a mess but I found it impossible to care. I lay down in the middle of the chaos, letting the reality of my impotency wash over me. I had no power and no one was coming to my rescue.

Time passed and I drifted.

"BELLA!"

I blinked, trying to focus.

"Bella? Please, talk to me! Oh, please, please. Wake up!"

"Edward?" I couldn't recognize my voice as I croaked his name.

"Bella! Oh, Bella, you're hurt!"

Strong arms lifted me upward, cradling me against a firm, warm body.

"Edward. You came back," I whispered, as he lowered me onto the bed.

I heard him rushing around, water running, drawers being opened.

"I-I need to clean and dress your h-hands. You're cut."

"I'm sorry," I croaked.

"No, no, no," he told me, openly crying. "I did this. This is my fault. What have I done? What have I done?"

He washed, cleaned and bandaged my hands meticulously, only pausing to wipe his eyes. I didn't speak. I had no idea what to say. Now that Edward was back, my fears seemed ridiculous, but I knew I'd feel them again every time he left me alone, locked in.

"I got scared," I whispered.

He stopped fussing over my bandages and raised his eyes to meet mine.

"That you wouldn't come back," I added.

"I would never leave you," he said, his voice incredulous.

"I know." I nodded. "But… there could have been an accident. If something were to happen to you…"

"You'd…" he paused, eyes widening.

"I'd die," I croaked. "I don't want to die, Edward."

He inhaled sharply, grabbing his chest as though my words caused him actual physical pain.

"You won't," he said. "I won't let that happen."

I shook my head and squeezed my eyes shut, feeling tears running down across my temples and into my hair. Edward controlled a lot of things, but he couldn't control everything. He couldn't prevent something from happening to him in the outside world.

"You can go home now."

My eyes flew open.

"W-what?"

Edward swallowed audibly and let go of my hands.

"You can go home now. I'll drive you or… I'll pay for a cab."

"You'll…"

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. My heart hammered away as I tried to make sense of what Edward was saying.

"I… I can't do this anymore," he whispered. "I never should have done any of this. I've ruined everything. I've made you like this; sad and hurt and scared. I only wanted to make you happy. I never wanted anything like this."

He looked at me. His eyes were glassy with unshed tears, his bottom lip trembled.

"I'm so sorry," he managed to choke out before standing up and leaving the room with the door wide open.

I lay on the bed much longer than I probably should have, given the circumstances. If I were an entirely sane person, I would have probably run down the stairs and away from this house, and Edward, as fast as my legs could carry me. But I didn't, so I had no choice but to seriously question my own sanity for lying there, waiting for God knows what.

"Are you ready to go?"

I was startled by the sound of Edward's voice. Sitting up slowly, I saw him standing in the door, holding my jacket that I didn't know he had brought along when he took me. I looked him over carefully, taking in his rigid posture and closed off body language, but nothing about him scared me. I stood up and walked to him, letting him help put me in the jacket. He reached around me from behind to zip it up when suddenly his arms closed around me, holding me to him.

"Please, don't be scared," he said urgently, feeling me tense up. "I'll take you home."

He sighed into my hair.

"I just wanted to hold you one last time."

"Edward," I whispered, not knowing what else to say.

"I love you," he said softly. "And… I have to ask you something, please?"

"What?"

"Please don't go."

I gasped. Had it all been a trick? Had he been lying?

"Come with me," he continued. "We can leave here. I have another house… it's down in Austin. Bella, we could have a life there. A real life. Together. It wouldn't be anything like this and… and I won't make you go with me if you don't want to."

He sighed.

"We could start over. It's beautiful down there, and warm. I'd take care of you, and you'd take care of me. We wouldn't have to be alone anymore. And… and I'll do anything to prove to you that I… that I'm not… bad. And maybe… maybe someday you'll forgive me for everything I've done to you and we could try… you and me."

He gave me a light squeeze and then released me before slowly turning me around to face him.

"W-what are you thinking?"

Nothing. I wasn't thinking anything. I couldn't. Conflicting emotions tore at me from every direction, leaving my insides feeling raw. I had reached my limit and felt as though I might shatter into a million pieces. I was scared, sad and tired. Most of all, I wanted my bed. I wanted to sleep for a hundred years. I wanted…

"I wanna go home."

Edward didn't say anything and I couldn't find the courage to look up at his face.

"Please," I whispered, wrapping my arms around my middle. "I want to go home now."

"Of course," Edward rasped. "Do you want me to drive you?"

"Okay."

Walking through the house, I registered everything around me, especially the grocery bags whose contents were scattered everywhere outside my room. I could only assume that Edward had come upstairs to let me out and had seen the destruction the moment he opened the door, making him drop everything in his hands. My heart clenched when I saw that he had purchased potted plants for the windowsill in the kitchen, as well as candles and a whole chicken, which he was going to cook for our dinner tonight.

We drove in silence all the way until we reached my street. The trip had taken less than half an hour. Outside the car, people were walking and driving by, living their daily lives and paying little notice to us.

"What will happen now?" I asked, staring out the window at the familiar sight of my building.

"I don't know. I won't…"

He cleared his throat.

"I won't go anywhere. If the police show up… I'll come along."

"I-I wouldn't… I wouldn't do that," I whispered, finally looking at him. "When they ask me, I'll make something up. That I took a trip somewhere, or something."

"Why would you do that?" he asked, dully. "It's not like I don't deserve getting arrested."

"You know what you did was wrong, and you did it to save me. Thank you for doing that."

Edward nodded. He looked so different now. Solemn and sad. The worst part to look at, though, were his eyes. They seemed completely vacant, as if all life had been drained from them.

"We'll see each other again," I said. "On campus and stuff. We can be…friends."

Even I could hear how lame I sounded. Edward could as well, because he let out a humorless chuckle.

"You won't see me again, Bella."

"Why not?"

Why was the thought of never seeing him again so terrifying? Edward turned his head and looked at me.

"Because," he whispered. "Because it hurts too much. Just sitting here… knowing that you won't be with me anymore. It's like I'm being ripped apart. Don't you understand, Bella? I _love_ you. I can't stop loving you. I won't stop wanting you. Not ever."

"I'm sorry," I cried, even though it was ludicrous.

I hadn't done anything to make Edward fall in love with me. I was the victim here and yet somehow I recognized that, of the two of us, Edward would be the one who wouldn't _ever _recover from this.

"Please, just go now," he choked out, wiping away my tears with his sleeve. "No more tears. I promise I won't ever make you cry again. You'll be happy. You always were, you know? Even when things were hard for you, you always bounced back the next day and wore a smile again."

_But when will you smile again, Edward?_

He reached across from me and opened the car door.

"Be safe," he whispered, gently nudging me to move. "Be happy."

I slipped out of the car, strangely frozen to the spot.

"I'll watch until you're inside safely," he said.

"You've done that before," I concluded.

"Almost every night," he admitted. "I'm so sorry, love, for everything."

He shut the door before I could say anything. As if in a daze I walked to the building's door and found my keys in the jacket pocket. I looked over my shoulder, meeting Edward's gaze. With great effort I made my lips turn up into a smile. A parting gift, I supposed. Edward didn't return it. He merely raised his hand for a moment before looking down, hiding his face from me. Once inside, I rushed up the stairs, locked myself into my apartment and ran to the window overlooking the street, but all I saw were red tail lights as Edward drove down the street and out of my life.

**This is not the end. I repeat: this is not the end. Have faith. **

**I'll do my best to update again soon, but I won't blame anyone if you decide to wait until this is complete. I know my updates are sporadic, at best. I'm trying.**

**Take care until next time. **


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